Shortts' World Tour

General Catch Up

2009-05-20T12:57:00.012+10:00

Well, I am so behind with the blogging that I thought I would cram lots of otherwise unrelated updates into one post and hope no-one notices that they are being short-changed...

First up - Phoebe is walking. Actually, she started walking when Nick was in the UK in March, and has honed her skills in the last two months to the extent that she now climbs stairs (and gets back down), pushes her dolly pram around, climbs the climbing frame at the park, and generally runs around causing mayhem and mischief.

She is also still to be found emptying kitchen cupboards on a regular basis - we can't attach locks in a rented property, and she worked out how to remove the elastic bands... - and recently we found her IN the kitchen drawer. Funnily enough I have a very similar picture of her big sister a couple of years ago!

Phoebe has never liked having her nappy changed, and now she just gets up and runs away... and she's really quick! I have added a flower to this picture for the sake of modesty, but you get the idea - she thought it was a great game!

She now starts tugging at her clothes as soon as the bath tap is turned on, brings you a bowl when she is hungry, her shoes when she wants to go out, and points to her eyes, ears, toes, tummy and nose on command....

She is turning into a very funny little girl indeed - usually to be found accessorised to the hilt with beads, bangles and hats. Was packing up some winter stuff the other day when I found hats and gloves - she wasn't sure about them at all - never had a pair of gloves on since she was about two months old...

For anyone who has been living in Outer Mongolia and hasn't heard, Nick has a consultant's job in Fife starting in August. These are very exciting times for us!! He went back to the UK for two and a half weeks in March - with Ella in tow as we got a free flight for her - and arrived 36 hours before the biggest interview of his life. Obviously, he got the job and we over the moon that the biggest hurdle of his career was cleared at the first attempt.

So we are coming home - and are really looking forward to having a short time back in Dunbar before relocating to Fife. Of course, that is very much dependent on selling our house in Sunny Dunny - the property market is not exactly in great shape right now! Our house is on the market, and generating plenty of interest, so we are cautiously optimistic. Nick could commute to Fife in the short term, but it would add about three hours to his day AND he would need to stay up there if on call, so not conducive to family life really...

So not only are we moving back close to where we met and married, but NHS Fife is also forging stronger links with the Bute Medical School in St Andrews and Nick is hoping to be able to be involved in undergraduate teaching there.

After achieving all he set out to in the first couple of days of the trip, Nick spent the rest of the time being sent across the country to look at houses (none of which we can afford!) and putting all our furniture back in the house. This will make a huge difference when we return home with four grumpy children after thirty hours of travel...

So while Nick was away, I amused myself with the children as follows:

Scienceworks in Melbourne - a bit like the kids' museums we visited in Boston and Sydney - full of hands on things for the children to do. There were three main areas - one about our human bodies and their capabilities, so they got to do things like run against Cathy Freeman (they lost!), climb, jump, test their grip strength, measure their reaction times, shoot netballs, paddle a canoe, compete in a wheelchair sprint... and make a skeleton pedal a bike!

Upstairs was a kind of city exploration centre with a construction zone - see pics above, recycling centre and a restaurant totally stocked with plastic food and all the children loved serving their mummy at the tables outside. I think Will is serving a whole chicken here...

There was also a whole floor dedicated to what goes on inside a house and how the items we use today were developed - so you could walk through a giant vacuum cleaner, see what goes on inside a tumble dryer, look inside a mattress (not recommended), see how a transparent toilet flushes, learn how food goes mouldy, see how an LP plays (or in James and Will's case, learn what an LP is...)and generally open drawers and cupboards and curtains.

There was even a section on what's down the back of the couch... James and Will were pretty interested in what was there, but Phoebe had free-range baby syndrome and just kept going back to the funny mirrors...

March also saw Crazy Hair Day at school - and having been informed by the boys that they wanted green and blue hair, I obliged accordingly. Was slightly worried that Will's hair might be permanently stained, but it washed out ok....

We have had (oh joy) nits (James, again) worms (Will, 1st time) and nits (Ella 1st time). I feel like some kind of plague house. Yes, I know that nits like clean hair, and worms don't really care who they inhabit, but I do feel somehow unclean. And don't even get me started on Swine Flu - at the moment I'm praying that the slow trickle of cases in Australia doesn't get any worse and we can fly home to Scotland unimpeded, though at the rate Victoria is closing schools and confirming cases, I'm getting a little twitchy!

Will has been student of the week for making friends in his class -ie not playing with his brother and his brother's friends all the time - though to be honest, I don't mind him playing with James and James is remarkably keen to play with Will - we're leaving in two weeks - it really doesn't matter if he doesn't make any new friends!!

Finally, the weather has started to turn cold recently and everywhere is looking green again - which is great cos I was sick of the dustbowl, but weird, as it seems wrong to have the green times in winter... This is eastern Beach with the outdoor pool just visible on the left. We are again freezing inside our little cardboard house and looking forward to coming back to a country with radiators..

Still get the occasional hot day though - here are the boys at Eastern Beach on a recent warm spell. I love the picture of them squatting by the rocks - they are watching a couple launch a fishing boat down the boat ramp.

In the other pic they are posing next to one of the Geelong bollards which line the shore in town - Old Mother Hubbard, in honour of Granny Jenny who was born a Hubbard...

Melbourne Grand Prix 2009

2009-04-07T10:33:00.009+10:00

We didn't think we could let our year go past without attending the Melbourne Grand Prix. As a one-time serious Formula One fan, I was always desperate to go to one and the experience did not disappoint.

And it was CHEAP to go - unlike the European Grands Prix, it cost about £90 to admit all of us for race day. We were almost sabotaged in our attemps to enter by a Melbourne train driver who dropped us (and about 30 others) at a station which was closed for the day as he had (wait for it) gone straight past the Gate 2 stop he was meant to stop at. Now, most of the stations are out of service on Grand Prix day, so he had a pretty straightforward gig - city centre, Gate 1, Gate 2.... and repeat in reverse.... but still he managed to cock it up, so we had to walk a bit (after actually having to climb out of the closed, gated, locked station...) but once we got there we loved the venue and the buzz.

There was so much going on - all kinds of classic cars on display, food and drink tents, lots of boozing and schmoozing. There was also plenty of flesh on display - Nick said he had to take a picture of this girl as she was wearing a chequered flag. Do I , as they say, look like I came up the Clyde on a banana boat?

We parked ourselves on the corner at turn three and tried to find a big enough space for all of us and Graham, Leanne and the boys - no mean feat as the banking was already heaving and the race was still FIVE hours away!

Fortunately, there was plenty of pre-race entertainment - three other types of car race - each louder than the one before. We had earphones for everyone - Phoebe tolerated hers for about 30 seconds, so I resorted to putting a hairband round her head.

We had army helicopters flying right overhead, followed by an aerial display team who were awesome. on about their third pass, one peeled of the back and did a twisty, corkscrew move. 'That one is just showing off' said James. Nick and I nearly choked on our beer - Umm, James, showing off is kind of de rigueur for a stunt pilot...

There was also the new Qantas Airbus A380 - otherwise known as the 'really big plane' and a military jet which moved so fast I didn't get any pictures - but the noise reminded me of Dunbar...

And at last it was time for the racing - I can't describe how loud a field of Formula One cars is, or how fast they move, but it was great to witness. It was the first race of the season, and the first race for Brawn Racing who subsequently took the first and second spots. I've been a big fan of Ross Brawn since his days at Benetton and Ferarri and I think he was directly responsible for much of their success through being a better strategist than anyone else in Formula one - even when he didn't have the best cars.

The green and white car in these pictures - the one with no sponsorship - is Jensen Button streets ahead of the field...

I have to be honest and say that the view of an F1 race is far better on the TV, but you don't go for the view! It was a gorgeous, hot day, a great atmosphere and the setting in Albert Park is stunning. The kids did remarkably well - considering how confined by the crowds we were, and the usual Shortt tactic of 'just keep feeding them' worked as well as ever. And they seemed not remotely bothered by the noise - in fact, Phoebe slept through about an hour of it.

Gran Anne visits

2009-04-07T10:32:00.019+10:00

Yes, yes, I know I'm writing this in a kitchen in East Lothian, and my blogging tardiness has reached epic proportions, but just suspend your disbelief for a while and pretend we're still in Geelong!!

So, in April my mum (finally) came to visit.

I think she was hoping that if she waited long enough, maybe we would have left and she could do a nice Australian tour without the added complication of family visits in the middle, but we're not so easy to get rid of!! (Just kidding ma!)

Anyway, I was very proud of her as, prior to meeting up with us in Torquay, she had ventured solo from the UK to Singapore, spent a few days there, flew to Perth, spent a few days there, flew to Adelaide and then driven all the way along the Great Ocean Road. Way to go Gran Anne!! And after seeing us, she moved on to Melbourne and Sydney, and then back to the UK with a LOT of luggage.

So, in spite of my advice that Winter was upon us, and the weather could be pretty chilly, the first couple of days were scorching - this is us at lunch and then messing about in the huge playpark in Torquay.

We went off the next day to get the ferry from Queenscliff to Sorrento - which as you will note from the website, crosses Port Philip Bay 24 times a day, on the hour,every hour... Remember that bit - it's important.

Ella is holding a sick bag in the picture due to her intermittent tendency to pebble-dash the inside of cars with her stomach contents. She has also been known to turn it into a multi-sensory production by following such and event with a chirpy chorus of 'What's that coming over the hill - is it vomit? Is it vomit?'

We had a lovely walk around Sorrento (lovely town, lovely shops, lovely lunch) and then headed off around to Frankston (which is on the opposite side of Port Phillip Bay to Geelong - see map) to go and see the Sand Sculpting Dinosaurs exhibition.

I have never seen anything like it - the scale, complexity and the attention to detail. The weather wasn't so great - wet and windy - and I think at one point we were the only people in there - but the kids had a riot doing sand pictures, ably assisted by Gran Anne.

Once we had drunk our foam-free cappucinos (the foam blew away - seriously) and picked all the bits of coloured sand out of various orifices, we headed back to the car to drive around and get the ferry. In no particular rush, I might add, since Nick had done the checking, and assured us the ferry ran 24 hours a day. Now, the more observant (female) among you may have noticed that the website does in fact say 24 crossings, not 24 hours, but we'll get to that bit in a minute...

So we left Frankston about 5.15, thinking we might get the 6pm ferry, but more than likely the 7pm - probably with a healthy dinner courtesy of the Golden Arches in between. And although I drove the Kia of Khaos like a demon, even managing a little wheel-screech on the roundabouts, we pulled into the ferry terminal just as the ferry was pulling out. Steve McQueen would have gone for it, but sanity prevailed and, after all, there'd be another one along in a hour. Chugging optimistically into the dark, deserted, unlit, empty, desolate, abandoned ferry terminal. Umm, Nick - could you go and check that timetable over there?

And that's when The Scottish Factor reared its ugly head again - mysteriously absent for months, and now resurrected by the arrival of my mother. There was, in fact, no 7 o'clock ferry. The next one was 6am the following morning. AND to add insult to injury, until two days previously, there had been a 7 o'clock ferry, but we were now on the Winter time table as the clocks had just gone back...

So, after a few moments of banging head on steering wheel, we turned around, headed BACK along the road to Frankston for only the third time that day, and then drove the loooooooooong way home around the bay. Ho-hum.

Under direction of mother, went off to Anglesea Golf Course to do some kangaroo spotting (don't be fooled by suggestions that Australia is overrun with kangaroos living in the wild and bouncing freely, Skippy-like through the bush - they do in fact all live an easy life on green, lush, watered golf courses where they get food, free veterinary attention and all the rounds of golf they can manage). If your eyesight's good, you might actually be able to spot one in this picture!!

In a fit of lunacy, decided to spend the next day in Melbourne showing Gran Anne the sights - or, in our case, the inside of a lot of shops! Mother managed to buy stuff in Laura Ashley (that well known Australian shop) whilst Lovely Hubby took all four children to the museum. Anyway, the rest of the day was uneventful, until we got on the 7 o'clock train home... and the Scottish Factor kicked in again. 6.55pm, cue conductor's announcement - 'Ladies and Gentlemen, we are sorry to advise that, due to a fatality on the line at Laverton, this train has now been cancelled and we will be arranging buses to take you to your destination' Aaaaarrrrrrgh!!! Won't bore you with the details of the painful trip home, but suffice to say we got home at 10.30 and told my mum we were never having another family trip involving her ever.

And finally, this is what she was responsible for when I went to the gym one night... Note the boys are wearing my shoes, as well as all their sister's jewellery. This woman is not to be trusted in charge of children...

Deck Tales

2009-03-17T19:16:00.009+11:00

There's no real tale to this blog post - but it just struck me the other day how much goes on out on our deck. It's completely enclosed and not at all overlooked, and feels a bit like another room of the house.

And you can see how comfortable my children feel out there - I think the naked bike riding came about because the boys have new bikes (Will for his birthday, and James because his £50 bike from Costco four years ago had reached the end of its natural life) and wanted to ride them whilst simultaneously being told to get ready to get in the bath.... I'm not sure, but I think Nick was in Scotland, so normal parenting rules didn't apply - I was so harried they could have got away with anything. Actually, I've just noticed that Will is, in fact, riding his old bike, and James is riding Will's new bike, so maybe new bikes had nothing to do with it and they just felt like getting naked!

The next classic is Laundry Basket Racing - the rules are (1) take one laundry basket, (2) insert sister of your choosing, (3) draw finishing line with chalk on the deck, (4) decide on number of laps, (5) hoon around the deck, drift on the corners and try to complete the race without dumping your sister out of the basket. Ella and Phoebe LOVE this game - I'm still waiting for the first big smash, after which we may need a permanent black flagging...

And finally, Phoebe, hat-fetishist extraordinaire - desperate to put a hat on her head, but still slightly lacking in the skills to do so! Though it's admirable that she could balance it there at all. Actually, it's also impressive that this is even a hat - in the last few days, she has attempted to put a sock, a pencil case and a pair of pyjama pants on her head. Future career as a milliner, perhaps?

Pako Festa

2009-03-03T13:42:00.019+11:00

Pako Festa is an annual festival to celebrate all the nationalities which come together in Geelong and is held - funnily enough on 'Pako', or Pakington Street, just down the road from our house....

Will and Ella were walking in the parade this year as they were part of the Geelong Gymnastics Centre group, and James, Phoebe and I watched from a street corner. The day had started off chilly, but in true Geelong style, by the time the parade had begun, it was scorching.

There were hundreds of different groups walking and the parade was so colourful and vibrant - even the pipe bands were up to scratch!! My favourites were the Chinese performers who had drummers, dragon dancers, ladies with fans, beautifully embroidered outfits...

There was a big representation from Eastern Europe - Serbia, Croatia, Poland, Estonia, Latvia, Slovenia, Bosnia, Lithuania - and we made a bizarre discovery - Lithuanian traditional dancing is almost indistinguishable from Scottish country dancing. As we were watching them on one of the stages after the parade, Nick and I both turned to each other and said 'That's a Dashing White Sergeant!' The main difference (in Geelong) being that some of the Lithuanian dancers were under 60. Some of them were even under 20. The same cannot be said of the Geelong Scottish Country Dancing Group. Let's just say I don't think it will be in existence for much longer...

We had fantastic German food for lunch, sushi rolls for dinner, chocolate strawberries for snack... and a really enjoyable day in the sun.

Swimming Lessons

2009-03-03T13:42:00.017+11:00

One thing which has been really fantastic in Geelong is the quality of swimming tuition - there is a swim centre dedicated only to teaching (ie you can't just go there for a splash about) and we have lessons for all the kids on a Saturday morning.

The thing that we have noticed is that before they teach children to swim, they teach them not to drown - how to hold onto the edge of a pool and 'monkey walk' along to the steps, how to turn as soon as you go under water - ie turn back to face what you fell from, how it feels in the water wearing clothes or a life jacket, how to float on your back... all simple things, but you can see that it could be the difference between a child panicking and drowning, or possibly just climbing out a bit wet.

Phoebe goes in the pool with Nick and happily jumps in from the side, goes underwater and pops back up facing the right way, holds on to the side of the pool and climbs out and swims to daddy through a foam 'tunnel'. Humpty Dumpty and Ring a Ring a Roses are also part of her repertoire, and she likes to court danger by trying to swim away from Nick, which is only temporarily successful...

Ella is a true water baby and has made incredible progress this year - she can swim short distances by herself and is learning the beginnings of proper strokes. She can retrieve toys from under water and loves to put her goggles on and look under water at other people - especially if they make funny faces at her!

The slide in the picture here only comes out for the last class of each term, so it's a bit of a treat.

Will has also suddenly got the hang of the swimming thing and now seems to genuinely enjoy his time in the water - as with most new things for Will, it took a while for him to get his confidence up. Will can actually swim well and does a beautiful breaststroke (pizza arms!), but doesn't have the confidence to do it for very long! He has been learning back and front kicking with a board to get ready to move onto backstroke and crawl, and has recently started adding the arm movements.

A big milestone for Will has been getting him confident under the water, but with the aid of a few sinking pool toys, he now dives to retrieve them beautifully. Both boys love it when we throw the toys to the furthest ends of the pool and send them off in search of a particular colour.

We have noticed that Will needs to keep going to the pool regularly to keep his skills and confidence up, as opposed to Ella and James who just throw themselves straight back into it after an absence, so I am looking forward to lots of visits to the Dunbar pool once we get back.

James has been our real star - progressing from non-swimmer to fully-fledged crawl and backstroke swimmer - this is a picture of him doing crawl, proper breathing and all, which is better than his mother can do... He can't do 'pizza arms' as well as Will yet, but I guess everyone has a natural stroke they feel more comfortabe with, and James' is crawl. He is absolutely at home in, on or under the water, and, when not actually swimming, is usually to be found doing underwater handstands or somersaults. Or trying to dive, but our efforts to eliminate the comedy belly flop have been less than successful!

We will really miss Geelong Aquatic Centre - both for the quality of teaching and also for the fact that we have all four children accommodated in simultaneous lessons. I don't think we'll be able to manage that in Scotland.

Will starts school

2009-03-03T13:41:00.004+11:00

Though it seems about two minutes since I was waving James off to school for the first time, suddenly it was time for Will to start - and I must confess to feeling less emotional about it than I did the first time round.

I think Will has been so ready for school for such a long time now - every day he sees his brother go off to school, and then return home (mostly unscathed) with tales of what he has learned and who he has played with (OK, I admit, I have to drag most of that information out of him, but I can pretend it's freely given and that I live in sitcom-world). Will is familiar with the playgrounds, the buildings, most of James' friends... so I wasn't surprised when he headed into his classroom quite happily on day 1.

I'm not going to pretend that he hasn't had a couple of momentary wobbles in the first few weeks - like the time he said he had a headache in the morning, so I said that if he went to school and still really had a headache, his teacher would call me.... so eventually at midday the call came from the school 'Will is complaining of a headache' - when I picked him up he was grinning from ear to ear, and insisted on eating his lunch as soon as he got in the car cos he was starving. 'Will' I said, 'is there actually anything wrong with you?' 'No' he said 'I mean yes...'

His teacher did apologise for calling, but said he had been adamant all day that his head hurt and his mummy had said that if his head was still sore, the school would call his mum. He has been assured that this should not be repeated, for the sake of his health...

Apart from that he has been mostly fine. We have established that three kisses (no more, no less, and none on the lips) is the right amount before he stands in his line to go into school, that he can't scooter to school with his exceptionally large bag on his back as he falls over, and that (lo and behold) his teacher agress that we need to work on his 'inside voice'!

James has been really pleased to have Will at school too - and Will has spent most of his break time playing with James and his friends - so much so that his teachers have had to encourage him to play with his own classmates sometimes. But he is making friends slowly in his own class and I hear him making plans in the morning about who he is playing with at lunchtime and who he is playing with at little break. I hope he settles in as well when we go home to Scotland!!

Phoebe is One

2009-03-01T19:16:00.014+11:00

Hot on the heels of Will turning five, came Phoebe turning one.

This also completes the odd-number quartet as we now have a 7, a 5, a 3 and a 1.

I decided that we would have a typically Australian cake for her birthday - a Chocolate Ripple Cake. Apart from being quite possibly the tastiest cake I have ever eaten, this has the added advantage of having only two ingredients - Chocolate Ripple biscuits, and cream to sandwich it all together. You make it, put it in the fridge overnight, then consume with gusto. This is definitely a recipe I'll be taking home with me - though I'll have to find the perfect Chocolate Ripple biscuit replacement.... I did add some pink glitter sprinkles, but nothing else, which, considering my usual excesses, showed a remarkable level of restraint...

As you can see, Phoebe was extremely pleased with her cake, and also tried to eat the bowl, restyle her hair and give herself a face mask.

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I thought I would show you all some other pictures of Phoebe at 1 - she is a funny, cheeky, stroppy, cuddly, chunky, gorgeous little minx with a love of headgear and climbing. Perhaps those two facts are somehow related and we should put a crash helmet on her every day, as the things she manages to climb on get higher and higher...

She would also appear to have passed through her ginger stage and come out the other side relatively unscathed (phew)- she's as blonde as the rest of them now, with 16 teeth, rosy cheeks and a big round tummy.

Not walking yet, but I don't think it's going to be long...

Jirrahlinga again...

2009-03-01T19:16:00.013+11:00

So we went to Jirrahlinga again - I won't bore you with much commentary on it this time, but I have tried to get some pictures of animals we didn't get the last time - a white peacock, for example - I have never seen one before, and it was quite a sight:

Also managed to get a good wombat close up this time - they really are the cutest animals ever - I would love to pick one up for a cuddle, but they do have alarmingly long claws.

Was chuffed to get this great shot of a joey in its mother's pouch - watched it climb in headfirst and it's very freaky when you see it turn around on the inside. Thoughts of John Hurt in Alien spring to mind, but then, I know what it feels like to be John Hurt in Alien, with an ever expanding gut and the feeling that the creature is going to break out the front at any moment...

Also got a picture of these two lovely cockatoos - or something similar. They were really good at saying hello, but we were in stitches though when we were leaving as one of the big parrots at the gate was doing a PERFECT imitation of Will's whiney cry.... He couldn't see why that was funny, for some reason!

And finally, some more Australian icons - koalas and roos. Probably the last for a while!

Will's Birthday Party

2009-02-14T19:13:00.004+11:00

Remarkable as it seems, our baby boy is now 5 - we had a little party at Sparrow Park for him the weekend after we got back from our trip. Thought of course it would be hot and sunny - which it was - but what we didn't count on was the galeforce winds whipping across the park... and the grit and sand flying around...

Everything tried to blow away - table cloth, napkins, sandwiches... children! We didn't even get close to lighting candles, but Will pretended to blow them out anyway. And the kids had a great time playing on the climbing frames at the park and hunting for pirate loot bags we had hidden about the park... and then taped down so they couldn't blow away!

Grannie Jenny and Auntie Kim were also in attendance, having arrived a few days before from the UK. But I don't have any pictures - I think I was too busy trying to hold things down...

Jan 22nd - 26th - Echuca and Home, or Why Sometimes You Are Just Supposed to be Somewhere

2009-02-07T19:43:00.012+11:00

So, as I said, we were pretty much stuck in the van for a while after we arrived - the wind and dust were still so bad that the children had to put on their swim goggles to go to the toilet block - so we had to amuse ourselves in the van. This is Phoebe sitting in the sink - I really don't know why - and also Phoebe being SpiderPig - which she and the other children thought was hilarious...

Eventually the wind died down a little and, under pressure from the kids, we decided to venture into the pool at the caravan park - which, considering the amount of dust and leaves therein, was fairly brave in itself, but the kids were game so off we headed.

Had been in about 45 mins and were contemplating heading off when things went very wrong - turned around to see a man attempting to haul his apparently unconscious daughter out of the pool - Nick leapt into action to help, and I rounded up children as other people tried to calm the girl's hysterical sister, and someone else called an ambulance. So there I was, in the pool, holding three out of four children, watching Nick give CPR and thinking 'What the hell happened? This was a teenage girl of at least 5' 7", in a very small and shallow pool (you can see the rough size in pic below), having a laugh with her dad and sister, and surrounded by probably 25 other people. How could she possibly have drowned?

It was so surreal watching it all unfold - and the kids saying 'What's daddy doing?' - and I pretty much stayed put for a couple of minutes, partly because I was a bit shell shocked, and partly because I honestly expected the girl to cough up some water and be fine, but as it became apparent that that was not going to happen, I got out and started gathering towels, shoes and other bits and pieces which seemed to take so long - and by now I really wanted to get the kids out of there!! And all the time all I could hear was Nick (now aided by two nurses also staying at the park) feeding info to the ambulance dispatcher via someone else - snippets like GCS of 3, not breathing, no pulse... and by the time I left the pool I reckon they had been doing CPR for 10 minutes already.

So I went back to the van and waited - saw the ambulance come and go, and still no sign of Nick. So I drank a few glasses of wine for medicinal purposes... And after a couple of hours he reappeared having accompanied the girl to the hospital. Turns out that when the ambulance arrived, they couldn't get her heart or breathing stabilised even with defibrillator and oxygen, so Nick and one of the nurses went in the ambulance to lend a hand. And straight after getting to Echuca hospital, she was transferred by road to ITU in Melbourne - should have been a helicopter but the wind was still too strong.

At this point no-one was any the wiser what on earth had happened to her. We wondered if she had had a fit, inhaled a leaf, hit her head... In any case, Nick was very pesssimistic about her long term prospects having been down as long as she was - probably 25-30 mins all in before tha ambulance even got there.

Didn't hear anything else till a couple of days later, when the nurse who was helping came by to say that, after piecing family history together and having some extra tests run in Melbourne, it turned out that the girl had a previously undiagnosed heart condition and had apparently had a heart attack in the pool due to the exertion of racing her sister. In a way this at least helped make sense of what happened, but she was still under sedation and the prognosis was not good.

The night before we left Echuca, we discovered that she had regained consciousness, and could recognise family members, but could not speak. It looked like she would have a very long road ahead of her in rehab.

Or, at least, that's what we thought till the other day (end of Feb) when Nick got a phone call from the girl's dad - to say that she had had an internal pacemaker fitted, was totally fine and had been given the all-clear to return to school on Monday!! Nick was totally stunned and really chuffed. And I love my hubby - he rocks!! Obviously we were meant to get to Echuca a day earlier than planned...

Fortunately the rest of our stay in Echuca was considerably less eventful. We went wandering through town the next day - a really beautiful old Victorian town, but so dry and dusty - I can't imagine how beautiful it would look if it were green. And it was bakingly hot too - poor kids, I think we made them walk for miles!

The town is full of great little gift shops, cafes, restaurants, and lots and lots of cellar-door wine tasting... Because the area around Echuca is so dry, they are big producers of dessert wines like Muscat - which just so happens to be one of my favourite drinks - and some pretty hefty reds, and I'm pretty fond of those too...

The Murray River meanders through town and it's very popular to rent a houseboat in Echuca and spend a couple of weeks floating lazily on the Murray. Along the riverside, old-fashioned vehicles offer trips, and of course there are all the paddle steamers to choose from - we went on the Pride of the Murray. There wasn't any particular reasoning behind that, it just happened to be the one leaving next! Ella was sound asleep in the pram when we got on the boat, and woke up about five minutes before we docked, and was very confused... Are we on a boat? Umm, yes, but not for long...

There was also a bar on the boat - actually, it's Australia, there are bars in all kinds of places - so Nick and I had a beer and watched the (river) world go by. The river is extremely low just now - the last big flood was in 93, but it's hard to imagine how that would even be possible - I reckon the water is at least 40 or 50 feet below the top of the riverbank right now.

Children demanding drinks upon leaving the boat, so we stumbled upon Oscar W's - a gem of a place right on the river with great food, great service and great live entertainment. Sat outside and had a cold beer (barman most amused by query as to the availability of pints.... but beer just sold in silly little glasses in Echuca) whilst the childfren propped up the bar, amused themselves by licking tube-shaped ice cubes on their straws and amused the barman with their accents...

We loved the look of the menu so much that we booked to come back for dinner later that evening - it was fantastic - dinner out in a very swanky but totally unstuffy restaurant, with four impeccably behaved children. And the chef made them calamari specially, so they were in heaven....

This pic is Nick outside with the children - he looks a bit fried actually - and the next one is Will eating his chocolate/banana/ice cream dessert. The whole restaurant sang him Happy Birthday for the next day, and that is why he is looking a bit sheepish!

This is a picture of James concentrating on something at the table - probably colouring - and as usual, his tongue is poking out as he thinks really hard!!

The next morning was Will's actual birthday - we had promised him a new bike so that he would no longer look like a hamster on a wheel, but obviously couldn't get him one whilst travelling, so he was quite happy with the promise of one upon return to Geelong. He did get other bits and pieces too like Bionicles, books, Star Wars figures and DS games, and as a special birthday treat Nick made pancakes ( I don't think there was enough batter for a 'P') and then took them off to the cinema to see Bolt.

From then on the day went significantly downhill - Will was sick after the cinema, which we originally put down to too many sweeties, until it happened again, and then Ella started!! So poor Will spent most of his birthday throwing up, accompanied by Ella, and Nick and I spent most of Will's birthday cleaning up! We toyed with the idea of driving home early - could have been in Geelong in 2 1/2 hours - but decided to see how things panned out, and sure enough, the rest of us were all fine, and as you can see, we were back in the pool the next day, which was our last day in Echuca.

Headed into town again that evening, and ended up back at Oscar W's - in spite of the fact that they were 'full' and turning people away at the door, they 'found' us a space and fed us in style again. Probably the best restaurant we have been to in Australia by miles. Spiked James' hair before going out - hadn't realised quite how long it actually was... Scary thing is that when I met Nick, his hair was just as longand a similar (if somewhat neater) style...

Walked home and had a special 'Happy Birthday' sing song and cake as we had had to postpone it the previous day - Can't take any credit for the cake, it was a Safeway special, but I did tart it up a bit! It was extremely tasty...

And that, as they say is that. The end of the trip - the next morning we drove back to Melbourne and handed back the van. Am I glad we did the trip? Absolutely. Was I sick of the van by the end of it? Absolutely! Would I ever do it again - probably not!! Only just coped with four small children, but they keep on getting bigger... Got pretty sick of making (ie constructing) our bed every night, only ONCE managed to remember to secure all doors before travelling, and never want to smell another chemical toilet as long as I live.

Oh, and about the kangaroos - saw two, about an hour north of Melbourne. Turns out we really didn't need the 3500km round trip then...

Jan 20th - Surfer's Paradise to Echuca, or Big Roads, Big Dust, and a Whole Heap of Empty

2009-02-07T18:39:00.003+11:00

I could equally have entitled this post 'How to Miss Every Major Milestone Including Two Big Guitars and One Enormous Radio Telescope' or even 'How to Come as Close to Running out of Petrol as I Ever Want to Come'. But more about all of that in a minute...

We had decided not to head back south the way we had come as (a) we fancied a bit of variety and (b) we had only three days to make it to Echuca and needed the most direct route and (c) we hadn't seen a single (live) kangaroo since leaving Geelong and knew that we could remedy that inland.

We drove down the coast as far as Ballina then headed inland along the Bruxner Highway as far as Glen Innes - remember, the one in competition with Maclean for the 'We're more Scottish than you are prize? Well, I can state for the record that Glen Innes has no tartan lamposts, and although it is surrounded by towns called Dundee, Glencoe and Ben Lomond, it's also surrounded by towns called Llangothlin, Bolivia and Wandsworth, and a miniature Stonehenge. So not more Scottish than Maclean then, just a bit confused....

We then headed south on the New England Highway as far as Armidale - our planned stop for the night (and, I can advise, a WHOLE lot prettier than the Scottish Armadale...) this is when the roads got really straight... We could see for miles and were bound to see a kangaroo soon! Or not, as it turned out - got to Armidale with barely sight of another car, let alone wildlife , and parked up for the night. Armidale was really stunning, though we only saw it on the way out the next morning - Nick was joking around saying 'I bet they don't need any Orthopaedic surgeons here, just as we passed the sign saying 'University Hospital...' One to bear in mind for the future maybe!

So we headed off early towards Tamworth, Country Music Capital of Australia - planning to see another 'Big' on the list - the Big Golden Guitar. I mean, you couldn't miss it, right? Well, except of course if you were going through Tamworth during the annual Country Music Festival, and consequently were siphoned around the closed-off centre of town and saw only a couple of supermarkets, petrol stations and overpasses. Ah well, never mind - we'll be passing another Big Guitar later...

Joined the Newell Highway at Coonabarabran and kept heading south aiming for Forbes and planning to pass the big Radio Telescope at Parkes on the way - that would make up for the pesky guitar!

Passed through some very empty, desolate looking country on the way - and a great rain storm - and no bloody kangaroos either!! Had 160km of petrol left in the tank after leaving Dubbo (which is, incidentally, the best thing to do to Dubbo) and desided to push on to Parkes 120km away... Briefly considered getting fuel a couple of places outside of Dubbo, but the strains of Deliverance were too strong in our heads.... and then, we discovered that the concept of diustance left in a tank of fuel is somewhat elastic.....

As we neared the Radio Telescope turn off, we had 'lost' 25km worth of fuel somewhere and had only 35km left in the tank - it was 20km to Parkes, and 5km down to the telescope and 5 back.... so after a quick bit of mental arithmetic, we did a quick swerve away from the turn off and kept going.

Nevertheless, 20km on 35km worth of fuel? Not hugely worried yet, except, that is, until, we got stuck behind a slow moving truck on a twisty, uphill stretch of road.... and watched the fuel gauge go down 4 k's at a time.... 12 km to go, 16 km in the tank, 11 km to go, 12km in the tank, 10 km and 8, 9 km and 4... and by the time we had 8 km to go, the fuel gage read zero. Pretty stressed, but still, to be honest, I was thinking we would probably make it - don't cars always have a bit in reserve?? And then we started struggling up a long hill... there was NO fuel... Had visions of being stranded in the middle of nowhere with four hot and cranky children waiting for the next (a) helpful trucker, (b) NRMA patrol or (c) psycho axe murderer to come along. Don't know how Nick coaxed the van to the top of that hill, but he did, and then, like an oasis in the desert, we saw a petrol station about 500 yards down the hill. We had so little fuel we actually had to COAST in.... Not an experience I ever want to repeat!

Spent that night in Forbes about 30 km further down the road and left early again the next morning to set off for Echuca - stopped for Breakfast in Narrandera where (in theory) we should have seen another Big Guitar - but it was hot, we got sidetracked, and we photographed the 'Big Bum Trees' instead (my children named them...)

Kept driving through some increasingly windy conditions, and every truck that went by in the other direction nearly blew us off the road, and we could see a dusty looking horizon - but nothing prepared us for the dust storm we ran into after Jerilderie!

Not a driving experience I think Nick will ever want to repeat - as it turned out, a fairly unusual occurrence, but we didn't know that when we were driving - we wondered if it was always like that! Got to Echuca and everything was covered in dust - had to just sit in the van and wait for it to stop blowing... And yes, we still hadn't seen a single kangaroo!

Jan 16th - Maclean to Surfer's Paradise - or Goodness, what a big prawn...

2009-02-07T16:32:00.003+11:00

So we left to head north to Surfers' Paradise - late, obviously - and per recommendation from James and Lesley, stopped for a late lunch at the Macadamia Castle. No really - look... All things macadamia. And lots of things not macadamia. Soft toys, smelly soap and the like. But a nice lunch though. There's an animal park there too, but since it was only open another half hour and they still wanted to charge full entry price, we didn't bother...

And we passed the big prawn in Ballina (Now, I should have mentioned that we had already passed the Big Banana in Coffs Harbour on the way to Maclean, but the photo didn't come out. The Australians have an obsession with building big fibreglass statues of - well - just about anything really - see here for more details... Mention of more Big Things soon!

Countryside still stunning, still green...

So we arrived at Treasure Island holiday park about 6 and headed straight to the pool - and, as if by magic, all of a sudden, Will could swim. But only for half an hour - he hasn't repeated it since. The problem we have with our children at the moment is that Will can swim and thinks he can't, and Ella can't swim and thinks she can.... Ah, the joys.

Had dinner at the restaurant on site where the cricket also happened to be on.... And Australia lost... Again!! To South Africa. There was some very quiet 'yay-ing' coming from our table... And a lot of glum looking Aussies.

The next day Richard and Kaliki and their children Robbie and Asta all came to visit us at the park - so we spent the morning around the pool again, and the afternoon around the barbecue. Haven't seen R and K since 2001, so much catching up was done again. I should also point out how grateful we were to them for driving 5(!) hours south to see us. We would love to have gone as far as Hervey Bay to see them - by all accounts, it's a stunning place, but we simply didn't have enough time - that would have been another 10 hours driving for us and we were cutting it fine for getting back to Melbourne on time as it was.

Got up early the next day and met up with them again at Seaworld. Of course we were late... And almost had an altercation with a car park height-restriction barrier... Almost...

We never had any intention of doing any of the other theme parks as the kids are too small for most of the rides, but we really enjoyed Seaworld. We didn't even mention to the kids before we got to Queensland that we were going anywhere involving theme parks of any description - there was already enough 'Are we there yet?' without adding in When are we going to Seaworld?'

Saw polar bears, a fantastic dolphin show where we had front row seats, took the kids on flume rides (twice, in fact), saw pelicans, sharks, tropical fish, swam in the swimming pool, went on water slides... And it was actually CHILLY when we were at the pool - only we could get a chilly day in Queensland!

The kids were so impressed to stand on the Toasted TV stage - Toasted TV is the Saturday am show for kids here and it's always broadcast from Seaworld...

Went to the beach the next day - well, you couldn't go to Surfers' Paradise and not go to the beach, could you?

James perfected his boogie board skills, and Will proved pretty capable too - and Nick had a go, but suspected that he could probably do with a bigger board. Really, you think????

The beach was really quiet as the Queensland children had gone back to school, but pretty windy and the currents were really strong in the waves. Still, sandy, windblown children make for great photos....

And that was the end of our trip North - time to start heading back down.....

Jan 13th - Port Macquarie to Maclean - or Utopia, as it turns out...

2009-01-15T12:28:00.003+11:00

So we arrived in at Lesley and James' house in Maclean late, of course.... Got there about 10 to 6, just in time for hugs and hellos all round, followed by beer in hand and the news on the TV - had to see if we were on it after being filmed in Port Macquarie and we were!!! On the TV in Australia!!! Kids were well impressed.

As soon as we arrived, James (junior), Will, Ella and Caitlin formed a Gang of Four and disappeared off to get up to gang-like shenanigans. They weren't seen much in the next three days. The adults decided that there was nothing else for it but to drink - quite a lot, actually, which seemed like a good idea at the time! As you can see, Phoebe joined in with the beer... And yes, that is a beer cooler/stubby holder with boobies.
They're classy, those Aussies...

Spent a very long evening catching up on old times - haven't seen L and J since before they left the UK 18 months ago (funnily enough, that involved drinking too) and we managed to convince ourselves that really we hadn't changed much since our university days. Yeah, right...

Loved Les and James's house - green and lush surroundings, verandah most of the way round for watching the local wildlife, and across the road from the primary school, where their daughter Caitlin starts in January. Not likely to be an arduous walk to school in the mornings! Also loved being out of the van for a few days - although we slept in the van at night, it was great to have a bit more space to relax in - and other adults to talk to!

Discovered that Maclean has a long-running rivalry with Glen Innes in NSW about which town is the most Scottish - well, I can tell you all that from our point of view, Maclean wins hands-down - every single lamppost in the town is painted with a different tartan and her is a picture of me with mine - for anyone who doesn't know, my maiden name was Russell...

Just as an aside, the Spar in Maclean also has a Visitors' Book. And loads of people write in it. To be fair, I think it's more a Visitors' Book for Maclean, rather than one where you can record your innermost thought abour Spar per se (Lovely buns, please could you stock alphabetti spagetti etc), but I was tickled by it - never been in a supermarket quite like it before...

Anyway, the next day (in spite of niggling hangovers) we headed off to Maclean's outdoor pool - didn't really expect what we got in a town of 2000 people - an olympic size main pool, huge kids' pool and a water slide... So Les and James, remind me again why you like living in this friendly, lush, tropical riverside town with great amenities?

Can't remember what else we did that day, but I am sure the evening involved James barbecuing on the deck - I can say this with some certainty as I have the picture to prove it. I'm willing to bet the evening also involved beers. I don't have the pictures to prove this, either mental or photographic, but it would seem like a fair assumption.

Next day was baking hot, so we hid indoors - in this picture Les is getting ready to bake a quiche which involved a fair bit of preparation... and was sadly doomed from the start, but more about that later. Note more beers on the table...

We decided to soak the children in lieu of another pool trip (and obviously so we didn't have to travel too far from beer central) and once they were wet and cool, we decided to soak them again - this time in the bath....I'm not sure whether it had any actual effect on their dirt levels, but they had fun!

You'll gather that there are no water restrictions in Northern NSW. It was so nice to be able to turn a hose on the kids as we just can't do this in Geelong - in theory, we can't even fill a paddling pool in the garden, unless we do it with bathwater... And it was so great to see green again - it really brought home to us how brown Geelong is.

So, Les popped the quiche in the oven and off we went out to dinner in Yamba, about 15 minutes down the road on the coast. Great laid-back restaurant with a huge climbing playpark onsite for the kids - which of course made for a laid-back dinner for the parents! And more beer...

So we headed back to Maclean, and as I was getting out the van back in Les and James' driveway, I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye... And there, perched on the side moulding of the van door was the biggest spider I had ever seen. Now, let me say up front that (a) I don't mind spiders in the slightest and (b) I had been warned about Huntsman spiders and how big they were. Fine, thought I, a really big spider, but Huntsmans are not poisonous, so I figured seeing one really wouldn't bother me. What I was not prepared for was the ... well, meatiness of it. I mean, a good butcher could have gone to town on it. And it was sort of hairy - grey, unnattractive hairy like a rat with eight legs. So I very gingerly, very quietly got out the van and shouted on Nick to come and see it, which he did, and then I left him in sole charge to go and get Les, James and a suitable removal container.

This was a Very Bad Idea. By the time I got back outside to the van, Nick had lost the spider. Conversation went somewhat as follows:
'Where is it?'
'Ummm - I dunno'
'You what? (Voice rising)'
'Ummm - I turned around to speak to the children and...'
'You did what? (Voice becoming hysterical)'
'I turned ar...'
'So where 's the bloody spider?' (voice now stratospheric)
'Well, it went across the back of the seats and then I lost it'
'INSIDE THE VAN?????????? INSIDE THE VAN?????????? WELL YOU'D BETTER FIND IT OR I'M NOT SLEEPING IN THAT VAN AGAIN.'

So James, armed with a flip flop, and Nick, armed with the knowledge that he would be spending a lonely night in the van with only Helga the Huntsman for company, set off hunting in manly fashion.

I went inside, where Lesley was surveying the charred remains of a once-promising quiche. Something to do with new oven, unfamiliar timer and leaving the house in a rush, but I can confirm that a quiche which has spent four hours in a hot oven is, in fact, beyond consumption.

Within minutes, the boys had done the job and Helga was no more. I really wanted to take a picture of the beastie, but poor Helga had had such a furious flip-flopping that she wasn't the creature she used to be... I did spend a reasonable amount of time inspecting the remains to be sure they had, in fact, once been a spider, and weren't part of some cunning ruse dreamed up by the boys to get an early night...

So off we all went to bed, drama over, and can I just say, I'm really proud of the way I kept my cool during the whole event, never once becoming hysterical or unreasonable...

Sadly, the next day it was time to pack up and get going again - not without a tinge of sadness. It was great to catch up with old friends, great to do not very much for a few days and great to see Maclean. But all good things come to an end, and we had more catching up with old friends to do in Queensland.

First though, a photo opportunity for gratuitous flag waving atop Maclean's lookout point... Nice eh?

Jan 11th – Sydney to Port Macquarie – or I Think We’re Finally Getting the Hang of This Thing

2009-01-15T11:58:00.000+11:00

On the road by 7am again and managed a good couple of hours of driving before stopping for breakfast, then on the road again till lunch. Scenery up this end of the country is stunning – deeply forested and every colour of green, with every coastal town built on a river mouth as well, so full of blue and boats and beach and bridges – so pretty, would love to explore properly one day.

Arrived in Port Macquarie mid-afternoon – staying at a small park on the outskirts of town, but feels like we are in the tropics – surrounded by palm trees and bakingly hot! Parked next to a family from Hoppers' Crossing, about half an hour north of Geelong...

Other indication of having entered the tropics - went to the toilet block for a shower after dark and passed a cockroach the size of a cow on the way in, then was just putting my towel on the bench when a large spider appeared from underneath. Resisting the temptation to run screaming like a girl from the building, I gingerly grabbed my stuff and picked an alternate cubicle. I really prefer my nature outside when I'm inside...

This park had two friendly rabbits who would beg round the caravans for food, which made a change from the park at Sydney where there was a huge rat behind the van one day... The park in Sydney couldn't have been cleaner or better maintained but there was a big concrete storm channel running through it, so I guess there would be rats... Ella thought it was a squirrel though. We didn't correct her...

Went straight to the pool where Ella re-confirmed her status as The Fearless One – down the waterslide again and again. James is now very water confident – not swimming prettily, but effectively, loves swimming underwater and diving to the bottom to retrieve things. Will is still very clingy and unsure in the pool, but then he’s been clingy and unsure about a lot of things in life, so we’re hoping he’ll grow out of it. Phoebe is a little fishy who loves to push away from whoever is holding her and tries to go off on her own. Nick has been doing all the techniques from the Geelong lessons with her, so lots of time being ducked and popping up grinning.

Spent some of the next day in Port Macquarie itself – a really beautiful town – fairly sizeable with all theshops and services you could want, but also a choice or river activities and about half a dozen great beaches. Came back to the park to cool down with a swim in the pool.

Before leaving Port Macquarie the next day, went off to Town Beach with the kids in the hope of tiring them out for the drive. Usually a very calm beach apparently, but it was a full moon the night before and we're assuming that's why the waves were mental...

Did lots of wave jumping and James tried out his new boogie board. He was really good at it too! Also got filmed for Prime news on Channel 7 who were doing a story on skin cancer - filmed our kids as an example of being well covered up! Unlike many of the Australian children whom the 'Slip, Slap, Slop' message seems to have bypassed entirely. Left later than planned (obviously) and headed off to see Les and James in Maclean.

Jan 7th – Merimbula to Sydney – or Why You Should Never Move Motorhome in 40° Heat

2009-01-15T11:56:00.000+11:00

So buoyed by that resounding endorsement, we set off the next day for our longest stint – just under 500km to Parklea, one of Sydney’s North West suburbs. Left ridiculously early about 6.30am and made good progress north.

The journey north was through some of the most beautiful countryside we have ever seen – green rolling hills, blue mountains, flowers, pretty little towns... Would definitely recommend anywhere between Merimbula and Kiama for a holiday.

Had read that Hyams Beach near Jervis Bay supposedly holds the record for the whitest sand anywhere in the world, so obviously we had to go there.

Jervis Bay looked really stunning too and these pics show the kids on Hyams Beach (or very nearby – it’s hard to be sure we were on the right one...) so you can judge the colour of sand for yourself...

Great rock pools and stunning shells all over the beach, and we would have loved to stay longer if it were not for the fact that we had arranged to swap the van overat the Sydney Kea depot.

Needless to say, trying to keep to any deadline with four sandy, cranky, tired and hot children was never going to be easy and by the time we got to Sydney, it was 4.40 and in theory we only had 20 minutes before the depot closed – so we lugged stuff from one van to the other, yes, really in 40° heat. It was one of the most unpleasant things I have ever done, and I have to say the depot staff were pretty shocking - reminded us we had to do the transfer quickly, and then did nothing to help...

Anyway, we finally got to our campsite about 7pm, and discovered two things – (1) the DVD player did not work and (2) I had left ALL of my clothing (all, really all – had a pair of pyjamas and a swimsuit to my name) in the other van. Swore. A lot. Probably in front of the children. Considered returning to Geelong again, though quickly dismissed this due to lack of suitable travelling attire...

So, again felt better after a good night’s sleep, phoned the depot and arranged to have the stuff sent over in a cab, along with a portable DVD player. Won’t tell you how much that little moment of absent mindedness cost, but it was a lot...

Had a quiet day investigating the park – a bit of a hidden gem really, with its weird suburban location, but a busy place too with loads of other hired motorhomes in the middle of North/South drives.

Kids loved the two aviaries in the park, and the pool with the Jacuzzi in the middle, and I loved how spotless it all was – and the cracking sunsets!

Went by train in to Sydney on Friday 9^th and met up with Peta whom we met in 2001 when her husband Pete was doing a fellowship in Edinburgh – these are her two children making silly faces with our three...

Took the obligatory pictures of the bridge and

opera house – last time we were in Sydney as a family, James was three months old... so needless to say, our agenda this time was a little different – a little less parent-centred, shall we say...

So we had a long trek across town to the Powerhouse Museum to see the Star Wars Exhibition – it was a really good exhibition which we all really enjoyed – James did actually insist on being photographed with every single costume on display, but I won’t show you them all here...

Left there, went on a round-Sydney tour on the Monorail, then found a Wagamama’s (probably Nick’s and my favourite restaurant ever and 4 blonde children again a great source of interest for the oriental wait staff) ) on the way to get a train home.... which we eventually did and finally made it home about 9pm.

On the subject of blonde children, it seems there may be an aberrant gene somewhere in our collective ancestry as Phoebe is showing signs of... well, a slight... strawberry tinge to her hair. This has been suggested to me before, and I have dismissed it, but the longer her hair gets, the more I am confronted with the incontrovertible truth – Phoebe’s a ginger.

Now let me make it clear that we know lots of people with red hair and red haired children (you know who you are), and we even like some of them; it’s just that on previous form, we weren’t expecting one of our own... So Nick and I are now playing Hunt The Ginger Gene in our family histories but so far haven’t come up with much – though I’m wondering if my maternal grandfather was maybe a bit reddy blonde – I’d ask my mother, but have no internet access here and am not phoning Scotland on and Aus mobile. Maw – comment please?

Went on Saturday 10^th for lunch with Jill who used to share a flat with me and Nick in Edinburgh in 1993 – haven’t seen her since then, so much reminiscing was done. Kids seemed to decide that a house with no children needed some serious ‘noising up’ and did so with gusto – so we didn’t subject Jill and her husband to our holy terrors for too long – Back to the caravan park for a swim, pack –up and early night in preparation for the next stage of our trip...

Jan 5th – Lakes Entrance to Merimbula, or Once Upon a Time We Had Fifth Gear and Then We Didn’t...

2009-01-15T11:53:00.000+11:00

So we left Lakes Entrance and left a little bit of ourselves behind – in the form of a chunk out of the driver’s side rear of the van. (I was going to use near-side or off-side, but in common with almost every other female I know, I can never remember which is which. I vaguely suspect that near-side is actually the one far away from the driver, so not near at all, but as I’m also fairly confident that the terminology was invented by a man, this would make perfect sense...) Anyway, as Nick was turning us out of the very tight site we had been in, he clipped the Nissan Patrol beside us.

Obviously the Nissan Patrol was fine (I think they’re made from girders... non-Scots will be very confused by that), but the 3.3m high, 6.8m long house-with-wheels came off worse.

So after much %^&%$$ and £”£$%+, we set of for Merimbula – about a 270km drive.

Had some very beautiful countryside to keep us entertained as we headed east along the south-east corner of Australia – it was a real treat to see green again after the dusty brownness of Geelong, and also lovely to drive through a rolling, hilly landscape with great views.

Saw lots of signs reminding drivers to watch out for wildlife, but sadly didn’t clap eyes on any at all – am still desperate to see my first wild kangaroo but no joy so far. Well, actually, that’s not entirely true – saw two flat kangaroos (and a great deal of other flat fauna) by the side of the road – we have been warned by lots of people about driving at dawn or dusk because of the danger of hitting a kangaroo, but in this case I’m thinking the roos came off worse...

Nick and I have also solved one of life’s great mysteries – Who ate all the pies? The Australians did. Never had any idea before we came here that the national dish of any country could actually be pies, but it is. We have started looking out for the Hot Pies sign in every town we go through, and no matter how small the town, there’s always a pie to be had. Quality usually assured by association with an elderly female relative of some description (Aunt Betty, Grannie Gertie etc) but sometimes no such ploy is necessary – I think the sign we saw for Hot Emu Pies speaks for itself.

So it’s all going swimmingly, when as we are heading along an otherwise unmemorable stretch of road, there’s a clunk of disturbing volume, but everything seems to be fine, until Nick tries to select 5^th gear. And it’s gone. No warning, no Dear John letter – just upped and left. And on a stretch of road between Orbost and Eden where there is pretty much nothing except National Parks – most towns we would have been lucky to find an inhabitant, let alone a Ford service centre...

So we decided to push on and see if we could reach Merimbula – 5^th wasn’t the top gear, so Nick managed to survive with 4^th and 6^th and we made good progress towards our first stop at Malacoota- about 30km off the main road, but recommended to us by a friend and it didn’t disappoint – the pics at the start of this post show the crazy gang getting rid of the cooped-up-in-a-van feeling by wave jumping in their underwear... As you do.

We made it to Merimbula in the late afternoon and were really impressed with the town – and with the park – these pictures show

the kids in the pools (main and kiddie) but aside from this, there was also a huge jumping pillow and another pool and a shop and cafe on site – and the view from our site was absolutely stunning – these pictures show the kids sitting at tables directly behind our van, and Nick took the arty sunset shots from our site.

The only downside at Merimbula was that we didn’t have a powered site – i.e. one where you can plug in the water and electricity direct to the van, so although we have tanks for the water, it does mean things like no a/c as this runs off 240v only. So I am blaming this for the meltdown on our first night in Merimbula – I think the children pushed one too many of the wrong buttons and before you could say infanticide, divorce and suicide, Nick was threatening to drive us all back to Geelong and I was wishing he would...

But it’s amazing what a good night’s sleep can do, and the next day we had a fantastic day in and by the pool and Nick also got the van looked at at the Ford garage in Eden. As far as I can gather, the conversation went something along the lines of ‘Yup, you’re right – no fifth gear mate. Gearbox is going to need to come out mate. Not something I can do for you here mate. Too busy – it’s Silly Season you know... You could probably drive it to Sydney. It’ll probably make it... mate...’

Jan 4th – Lakes Entrance – or Gee That’s Pretty, I Wish I’d Remembered the Camera

2009-01-15T11:52:00.000+11:00

But I didn’t, so you’ll just have to take my word for it. Though this is a pic of Phoebe in the sink in the van...

After a closely fought game of mini-golf, pies were purchased for lunch and off we went across the bridge to the main beach – or at least to the lake-side of the main beach which was very pretty, still as glass, with a sectioned off kids pool and a big grassy bank to plonk the sunshade on. Nick called me over to show me a prawn he had caught in the bucket but any visions I had of slapping a shrimp on the barbie for dinner were short-lived – what he caught was more like a potential prawn, assuming it made it past infancy... it was about the size of a grain of rice, but still likely to be the only fishing Nick does this trip!

Would love to tell you that we had a great time, and we did, intermittently, but the kids were pretty heinous – not all at once, but more in a take-it-in-turns share-the-pain kind of way so by the time we left we were all pretty frazzled... but we walked along the seafront to the fish market and bought fresh gummy shark and warehou for dinner (Warehou is, as I discovered, not ‘warehouse’ they couldn’t fit on the label, but wahr –ay-hoo – and it was delish barbecued with garlic...)

Had a couple of beers and another early night. Party on Wayne...

Jan 3rd – Geelong to Melbourne, Melbourne to Lakes Entrance or Oh My Goodness, Is That the Time?

2009-01-15T11:19:00.000+11:00

Well, we got up nice and early on the morning of our big trip, planning to be out of the house no later than 8.30, pick up the motorhome by 10, be on our way by 11.30 or so, etc, etc...

Except of course that I live with Mr Tardy (I believe that Roger Hargreaves is planning a new Mr Men book all about Nick) and the four mini-tardies, whose sole purpose in life is to distract me from the job in hand and de-rail progress, and consequently we left the house at about 10. (I have been serially late for most things in the last 16 years, which is, co-incidentally as long as Nick and I have been together. Nick has rarely been on time for anything (including his own wedding) since he was old enough to be allowed out on his own. Since being late sends my stress levels soaring, and bothers Nick not a jot, I now pursue a policy of (a) telling him we need to be somewhere half an hour before we actually do and (b) sending him out of the house (with the mini-tardies in tow where possible) whilst I get everything ready to go).

Anyway, I digress; we were as late as we always are and got half way up the motorway before I said ‘I’ve left all the fruit in the fruitbowl’. No, we didn’t go back, but the thought of three and a half weeks of (a) rotting weeping fruit, (b) high temperatures and (c) ants has never been far from my mind...

Anyway, the van pick-up went very smoothly, though by the time we had filled in all the paperwork and unpacked everything into the cupboards, installed the car-seats and the children, found somewhere to wedge the pram and barbecue so that they wouldn’t maim us or the children in the event of a sudden stop, it was about 1.00pm by the time we left the depot.

... and then stopped just outside it as we (motorhome virgins) had forgotten to latch the cutlery drawer which made the most of its new-found freedom on the first bend, much to the amusement of the children.

We got slightly further the next time we set off, but not much – this time I had to go back and retrieve colouring books, Nintendos, dolly, muslin, baby’s bottle and 874 coloured pencils now on the floor as a result of the next big bend – instructed mini-motorhome-virgins in the necessity of hanging on to one’s possessions on slippy table and we set off again....

And got slightly further before the novelty of the onboard toilet grew too great and I had three children requesting a pitstop – and Phoebe, who had, needless to say, only just gone to sleep after a prolonged bout of screaming, promptly woke up as soon as the van stopped moving and started screaming all over again.

I will confess the ignorant optimism with which I had started the trip was slowly being replaced by probably a feeling I suspect very similar to that of someone imprisoned for a crime they didn’t commit...

Nevertheless, the last of the drive to Lakes Entrance was relatively without incident and Nick did a storming job managing the Great White Beast while I did not quite such a storming job managing the children. Sometimes they just don’t want to be managed...

Got a phenomenal view of Lakes Entrance on the way into town and went straight to the campsite and parked up for the first time. Had a walk, had an ice cream, had an early night...

Slap another shrimp on the barbie...

2009-01-01T22:40:00.000+11:00

Christmas, Geelong style... The children were not up ridiculously early, thank goodness, and we all opened presents together at about 8am. It was all too much for Phoebe who went back to sleep by about 10!

Ella was bowled over by her new dolls' house - complete with garden accessories including a vegetable patch - and the boy's main present was a Nintendo Wii which they have barely been away from since then.

Was determined that in having a strange, non-traditional Christmas in the sun, we would have a non-traditional Christmas dinner (at least by my standards) - so we ate outside and had a big barbecue with prawns and sausages. Nick proved a very able chef, and it was yum, but really not a patch on turkey with all the trimmings!

At one point when things were getting a little fraught, Will shouted 'Oi!! No fighting on Jesus' birthday - how old is Jesus anyway?' Ummm - ecclesiastical debate aside - 2008?

Nick's culinary repertoire has now expanded to include sushi - mostly to address James' ever increasing appetite for it - and here's what he put together a couple of days after Christmas. We were all impressed and have requested more soon.

And on the subject of expanding repertoires, Phoebe can now pull up to standing and climb stairs. Oh heck.

And James has a new alter-ego - Captain Underpants... I believe Captain Underpants has a sidekick too, Master Underpants, who may be appearing in photos soon...

And a kookaburra up a gum tree...

2009-01-01T19:33:00.000+11:00

Before I get on to blogging Christmas proper, I thought I'd give you a taste of some of the pre-Christmas festivities. First we had Will's kinder show with Christmas classics such as 'On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me.... yup, you guessed it - a kookaburra up a gum tree' - I don't feel the need to repeat it all here, but if I share the last verse with you, I'm sure you can work it out:

On the twelth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, twelve devils fighting, eleven emus kicking, ten wombats sleeping, nine crocs a weeping, eight flies a feasting, seven possums playing, six sharks a swimming, five kangaroos, four cuddling koalas, three little penguins, two pink galahs, and a kookaburra up a gum tree.

We were also treated to 'Six White Boomers' which I now know to be a Rolf Harris musical marvel... I must confess to having had a slight tear in my eye as Will has really loved his time at St Lukes' and I've found it to be very welcoming, but since I will be back there in January with Ella, it's not totally the end of an era.

Hot on the heels of Will's Kinder break-up, we had a get-together for our Thursday Playgroup, but went about 10km out of Geelong to one of the playgroup mum's places - had a lovely lunch, and Will and Ella ran about in more space than they have seen in months! This is a picture of the yummy mummies and most of the children, minus a few escapees...

We also had a Thursday Playgroup party where Dazzling Dan the Magic Man was performing - let's just say his tricks are hilarious if you are three, and leave it at that - but I don't have any pictures of this, or of my ABA end-of-year dinner, or our night out with an English colleague of Nick's who has now returned to the UK... December was a busy month (and an expensive one!), but no amount of cracker-pulling, Santa hat wearing or present buying could convince me it was really Christmas...

Few pix here too of a walk by the Barwon River with Thomas and Matthew in baking heat - with lightsabers obviously... but we didn't see any snakes - and a trip to the seaside at Barwon Heads...

Pix too of the kids playing in the back yard being 'Strayan' with vests on, and proving that a cardboard box is the best toy in the world.

Just one quickie - Ella was trying to remember recently what daddy did, so after I prompted her with 'ortho.... pae... dic...' her little face lit up with the answer... 'PIGEON!!' Yup honey, that's right, he's an Orthopaedic Pigeon.

And yes - Nick has been flying the baby. He hasn't dropped her yet....

One word

2009-01-01T18:45:00.000+11:00

Saw this recently on Lucy's blog, which she got from someone else's, so I thought I'd give it a go...

Where is your mobile phone? Kitchen
Where is your significant other? Here
Your hair colour? Blonde
Your mother? Edina
Your father? Meldrew
Your favourite thing? Coffee
Your dream last night? Janet
Your dream goal? Stability
The room you’re in? Dark
Your hobby? Reading
Your fear? Illness
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Scotland
Where were you last night? Geelong
What you’re not? Disorganised
One of your wish-list items? Quiet
Where you grew up? Lanark
The last thing you did? Typed
Something you're wearing? Jeans
Something you’re not wearing? Well
Your TV? Off
Your pets? Imaginary
Your computer? Shiny
Your mood? Relaxed
Your car? Dilapidated
Favourite shop? Monsoon
Your summer? Missing
Miss someone? Several
Love someone? Several
Your favourite colour? Red
When is the last time you laughed? Today
When is the last time you cried? November

The Scottish Factor - again...

2008-11-18T14:56:00.000+11:00

Thought I should give you all a quick update before Christmas hits... I am in total denial about the fact that it is nearly Christmas as it just doesn't feel at all Christmassy here even though there are plenty of decorations and trees around. I suppose it's the fact that I know it's not winter, so how can it possibly be Christmas?

Because I am in denial about Christmas, and because all my beautiful decorations are packed away in boxes in a warehouse in Duddingston, and because I could not bring myself to buy a cheesy plastic Christmas tree (and don't even get me started on the absurdity of Christmas trees in a land of hot Decembers and no native conifers), I decided to do something a bit different this year - obviously something to put the presents under is a given, but green and plastic? No sirree... So you can see the results here. I am pretty pleased with it, and the children still got to help decorate something. And yes, I am aware that a snow-covered bare-branch tree is just as absurd as a plastic conifer, but somehow I can live with this...

Anyway, although I know it's not winter, I can confirm that it doesn't actually appear to be summer either. The weather here has been truly shocking recently - the odd hot day interspersed with cold and rain. At the moment the rain is hosing down, and has been for the last 24 hours. Predicted to keep raining until Tuesday. Splendid. Of course, it's great in the sense that the water reserves are very low here and we still have water restrictions, but not so great in that I was expecting to have good weather in Australia. Like I said to Nick, only we could move to Australia and get cr*p weather... But at least the worse the weather gets, the more if feels like Christmas. If I miss a white Christmas at home though I will really cry. I got so hacked of with the rain a couple of weeks ago, that I thought I would look up the average rainfall in Dunbar versus Geelong - not much difference, as you can see.... So I have come to the conclusion that they must not be very good at catching (and keeping) the rain which does fall here.

I've been quite homesick recently, but also starting to get quite comfortable here, if that's not too much of a contradiction. Two things have happened to address previous whinges - they have started selling Pampers nappies here (you have no idea just how exciting that is) and I have managed to make decent cake using Australian Flora marg. Small victories, but you take what you can get....

Nick has been doing the odd bit of on call and private assisting, but his opportunities to wield a scalpel are still woefully lacking. Last week he was so stunned to actually get to do a knee replacement on his own that he had to phone and tell me. Apart from that, he has done three hip replacements as lead surgeon in 6 months - the rest has all been (some) assisting and (lots of) observing. Definitely not meeting the criteria for a fellowship in Lower Limb Arthroplasty and not one to be recommended. He is still hopeful that the upper limb component will be better from January, but even if it is awesome, he still feels that he has lost so much surgical technique just from lack of practice that he may have to revise what he was planning to do on his return to Edinburgh and /or try to extend his training to Feb 09 in order to get his skills back up to par. He actually taught a one-day surgical course in Melbourne last week during which he did more arthroplasty than in the whole previous 6 months... And it also begs the question, if they think he's good enough to teach... ????

It's been really wonderful for me and the kids to spend more time with Nick, but it also feels like such a wasted opportunity - knowing that maybe if we'd gone somewhere else, the tens of thousands of pounds it's costing us to have a family of four away for a year would at least have advanced Nick career-wise. We did consider briefly trying to do another fellowship somewhere else after this, but figured that that would be financial suicide and not an option! So, any answers to the following questions gratefully appreciated: (1) Stay here or go home? (2) Will there be a job for Nick if we want to stay here? Will anyone want to employ him if they have never given him a chance to show what he can do? (3) If we return to Dunbar, will there be a consultant's post for Nick in Edinburgh? (4) If not, where else in the UK will we end up? Is it fair to move back to Dunbar for 6 months to then discover we have to go elsewhere and uproot the kids again?

James has nearly finished Grade 1 and has been assigned his Grade 2 teacher for next year - though they of course have their long summer holiday between now and then and don't start back till February 2nd. In Australia, the classes are totally mixed up each year, so he gets to start on an even footing with a new group of children - a few from his old class, but most likely not. I have been in to see his Grade 1 teacher again - in trouble this time for saying 'ar*e' in gym class and because two girls in his class complained because he had told them to show him their belly buttons. Eh? Am I missing something here? Surely this is something a primary teacher can deal with? And allthough I like his teacher well enough, she has admitted that she has struggled to form a realationship with James this year. So fingers crossed for Grade 2...

In spite of the above, his report for the year was not quite as bad as expected!! Two years ahead of his class level in reading, on target for written skills, but starting to slip back a bit in maths - actually, I think he has lost some skills he had in Dunbar, so we have bought some books to do a bit of work with him over the holidays. From looking at his workbooks for the year, I can see lots of places where he hasn't done the work because I know he hasn't understood they way the question is worded, but obviously hasn't asked for an explanation...

I definitely don't think the core primary curriculum here is a patch on the Scottish system, but then I suppose that would be why the Scottish system is held in such high regard worldwide! And then I suppose you have to also weigh up the fact that James has been on three trips in 6 months, has a playground full of play equipment, has had two weeks of intensive swimming, has dedicated library and art teachers and learns Indonesian once a week... All of which won't be worth toffee though if he can't add and subtract...

Aside from that, we have been trying to give James a bit more dedicated one on one time and has has started painting Warhammer miniatures with Nick and playing strategy games with them. James is really loving this - his accuracy with a paintbrush is amazing for his age, and he is loving the fact that his Space Marines routinely whip Nick's orcs. And those of you who remember just how much time Nick used to spend painting Warhammer will understand how pleased Nick is to have someone to indoctrinate ahem... I mean initiate....

He has started playing Milo cricket on a Friday evening with his brother and lots of other kids from his school, and is still doing swimming lessons on a Saturday morning, but we had to abandon the Scouts idea in the end as there are no local 'Joey' groups, which is the age group he would need to be in. Just as well, as I can't get past the fact that the 'Joeys' were the bottom rugby team when I was at school - but that's another story...

James still draws constantly - cartoon characters, knights, pirates... He came home the other day with his version of an Australian Christmas too - Santa appears to be a ute-driving Cats fan, but then, who's to say otherwise?

Will has only two more kinder days to go and then he'll be a school boy after the holidays... He is DESPERATE to start school with his brother, and James is really looking forward to having him there too. His kinder had a 'wear your school uniform' day last week and it was so nice to see him all dressed up, and although he has all new clothes, they still look so big on him that he may as well be wearing James'.

He has finished with 'kindergym' gymnastics now and we are trying to work out whether to send him back into a boys development squad after the holidays - he is keen to do it, but it's more a problem of when the class is on and having to drag the three others along at the same time...

Will's biggest concern at the moment is that Santa won't be able to come in to deliver presents as we don't have a chimney - we have had to promise to leave the utility room door open in case he can't use his Santa magic to get in any other way. Ella, on the other hand, is generally horrified by Santa (because he's too fluffy, just like the candy floss) and we have had to promise her that he will not (1) come into her room, (2) want to cuddle her or (3) speak to her. James is wrestling with the fact that, apparently, some children in his class think that Santa might actually not be real and it possibly might just be your parents. Hmmm, as if...

Will is most excited about starting school as he knows that he will be learning to read. He does, in fact, think that he will be able to read on day 1 when he comes home and has plans to plough straight into some of his brother's BeastQuest books... Actually, we are going to be doing some letter work with Will over the holidays too as, although we got one letter from the Victorian Education Board which included the fact that Will is not expected to know his letters before school, we also got a letter from the school indicating that the current prep children had problems distinguishing upper and lower case letters, so could we please make sure our children knew the difference.... Sure. So you'll be covering what exactly in school?

Ella is her smart, stroppy, sassy self and is itching to start kinder in January. She had an orientation day recently and I barely saw her - home corner, doll, pram and playhouse. I know when I'm beaten. Still, it did give me a chance to have a chat with another Scottish lady whose little girl Ruby is starting in the same group as Ella. Kinder for Ella is only two half-days a week, but it will be enough to give us both a break from each other and or me to do mundane things like food shopping which are nigh impossible with Ella in tow.

She is now (finally!!) toilet trained and in typical Ella fashion, has gone the whole hog and is also dry at night. She is still a demon in the swimming pool and in January will move up a level into the first class without parents in the pool. She has started drawing people with arms, legs faces, hair.... and she does it several times a day, so when you add this to the drawings by Will and James, you can understand why we have a problem with disappearing computer paper here...

This photo shows Ella emptying every single toy out of her room. I told her to tidy up one day, and when she didn't do it, said I would take one of her toys away. Fine, she said, take them all, I don't want a single toy, I'm going to take every single one of them out of my room. And she did. Every single one. I am no match for her, I fear...

Phoebe has passed through her really difficult stage and turned into a much pleasanter baby all round!! She is a complete eating machine - this picture shows her eating tuna California Roll, seaweed and all...

She's still a fairly petite soul though - just over 20lbs and around the 50th centile

She is also now a bottle-fed baby, having decided at 10 months that my services were no longer required. Wanted me Monday, had enough by Tuesday... It's fine on the one hand as I know it's baby-led and she is happy as can be, and I don't need to worry about how much I drink, or getting home to feed her, but on the other hand it was a bit abrupt and because she's our last baby, I'm a bit sad.

She has mastered the art of sidewinder-technique commando-crawling to the extent that she is as fast as any conventional crawler, and she has also started pulling herself up to stand (in fact I had to stop writing there as she has just pulled my camera on her head), usually in the bath... in between splashing and soaking everyone in range

Anyway, this has taken me hours and I need to head out into the torrential downpour to get supplies, but I will leave you with one picture of us out with Graham and Leanne last weekend - last minute invitation to the Blue Ribbon (Emergency services) Ball and we had a great time. We now have 3 (Three!!!) babysitters on tap and the kids love it when we go out - probably because they are sick to the back teeth of us....

Merry Christmas to all - will blog our Antipodean Festivities soon, as well as details of our Big Trip North in January, followed by the arrival of Grannie Jenny, Grandpa Royce and Auntie Kim, then by Gran Anne and Tony, then back to school... Our year will be over before we know it!!

Ella is three

2008-11-10T20:19:00.000+11:00

Had a Pink, Red and White themed birthday party for darling daughter the week after Maldon. We had lots of Ella's and my friends from playgroup, gymnastics and kinder and we had suitably red, pink and white food - white chocolate crispie cakes, white choc cherry rocky road, ham and cream cheese sandwiches, pink and white flower cupcakes, red watermelon, white choc dipped strawberries, chips and pink, red and white dips, red, pink and white gummy sweets... and pink, red and white grape juice (ahem!) for the grown ups.

The girls made sparkly wands and pretty bracelets and played sleeping bunnies and musical bumps - to Abba, of course... Start them young! There was so much glitter and ribbon and so many sequins and beads around that it looked like a fairy had exploded

They also had pretty flower headbands but these proved to be less than robust, so pictures are minimal... you can see in this photo Phoebe is thinking 'as soon as you take this picture, I'm ripping this blinking thing off my head'. Actually, she's probably also thinking 'I see beads. I could eat that, I could, and those shiny sparkly sequins. Bet they're tasty' Shortly followed by 'A dress? You put me in a dress? You know I can't crawl in this, right?' Really? Gee, I never thought of that.... hehehe...

So Ella's cake was a triumph of pink, flowery, sparkly girliness. You'll note I have photographed from above to disguise the sunken middle... which wasn't too bad anyway by the time I had cut down the edges slightly and filled in the middle with extra buttercream! So at least I can still make them look pretty - maybe I just need to start buying the sponge cakes...

And I was pretty happy with the flower fairy cakes too, though the technique needs a bit of perfecting! Ella gave me a hug afterwards and said 'thank you for my happy birthday mummy!' Ahhhhh...

Help me Obi Wan, you're my only hope...

2008-11-04T16:28:00.001+11:00

Help me Obi Wan Kenobi.

I have been imprisoned by the evil Princess Ella. Her cruelty knows no bounds, worse even than the terrible Jabba the Hutt. She has restrained me in a pink wheeled contraption where I am held fast by a number of straps.

Cruel instruments of torure my captor refers to as 'pretty sparklies' have been applied to my hair, and although I still have my gun, it is useless against her might.

Hurry Obi Wan. I don't know how much longer I can endure this torture...

Tent Tales

2008-11-04T12:19:00.001+11:00

So, the first weekend in November saw our first experience of camping Aussie style. We went with Graham and Leanne and a few others up to Maldon, a stunning little historic town about two hours north of Geelong. It was the weekend of the Maldon Festival, a long-running folk festival which had performers all over town for four days.

Apparently it never rains in Maldon. Which would explain why it was raining when we got there on the Friday. The Scottish Factor strikes again... Our first experience of putting up the tent for real - and it all went remarkably smoothly, with much help from Ruth and Dave. The tent has three rooms - a bedroom at each end and a communal area in the middle. We set it up with our camp beds at one end, Phoebe's cot in the middle and the two sets of camp bunks at the other end. Phoebe will graduate to the bottom bunk under Ella when she is big enough. There is also a big awning on one side which gives us even more space for sitting and cooking. You can see Ella's new pink pram in this picture - it was a birthday present to replace her £4 Asda pram which only has half its original wheels left, but has done remarkably well considering it's been around the world.

In attendance for the weekend were the six of us with the tent, Graham, Leanne and their three boys in a caravan, Ruth and Dave in a caravan, Jenny, Andrew and their two children in a trailer tent, Neil and his son Scott with a caravan and Mick with his guitar, a bucketload of cheek and a one man tent. I suspect the last two facts are not unrelated... This picture shows Neil, Nick and Mick waiting for the sun to cross the footy oval and warm up our sites.

On Friday night we went into town to the Maldon Hotel for a little while and saw a couple of bands while the children were entertained by Michael the Balloonologist - you can see the results here. After the kids were in bed, we did our best to have a wild night, but it was truly freezing for those of us trying to sit outside drinking beer... so off to bed!! The new sleeping bags did their job in spite of being very cheap on sale and we spent a very comfortable first night in the tent.

Saturday morning dawned bright and clear and Ella opened her presents, all of which we had taken with us, apart from her new kitchen which she got when we came home. Leanne brought us birthday cupcakes first thing too, and everyone sang Happy Birthday. This was all too much for Ella who started crying. I had to promise her later there would be no more singing!!

After brekkie we headed off to the craft fair at the primary school. It was scorchingly hot so Nick and I bought hats - mine's a bit 'country' and as previously mentioned, Nick's is very 'jolly swagman' - but there really was a swagman there - he's called Campbell and he travels from festival to festival reciting traditional stories and verse.

The children had their faces painted - James and Matthew with flames, Ella with a butterfly and Will with a truly horrific skeleton face... which fortunately didn't make it into a photo! At least, not intact.... We drank Aussie cava for my birthday and local beer whilst waiting - Mmmmm!!

Went for a wander into town afterwards and found the bandstand full of morris men. Weird that I have never seen them in the UK, but come to the other side of the world and here they are... Also came across this band busking - note that the woman at the back has a custom-made washboard with BOOBIES!!

Headed back to camp to ice some cupcakes I had made for Ella's birthday and blow out some candles. She loved Leanne's candle that played Happy Birthday - amazing what you keep in a caravan! Bit of a race against time to ice the cupcakes before the sun melted the icing, but I guess they were ok as all the cupcakes bar one were gone in the next ten minutes...

Stayed around camp for the rest of the day - our sites were right next to the kids' playpark so we didn't see much of the children - they were off with Matthew, Thomas and other random children for hours at a time, only reappearing for food and drink. Barbecue for dinner then more beer after scrubbing children free of face paint...

Sunday we headed off to Mount Tarrangower Reserve for a picnic lunch. This is the main festival venue outside of Maldon itself and we sat for a while on the rocks listening to various bands while the children learned circus skills and did painting. This is Ella wearing Jackson's hat and Nick eating blueberries, in case that's not obvious... What you can't see in these pictures is James having a strop because he wasn't happy with his painting, or how head-to-toe filthy the children were from all the dust, or how swelteringly humid it was, until...

...it started to rain, so we headed for - where else? - the Guinness Tent. Leanne took the boys back to the campsite and Ella very accommodatingly fell asleep in the pram, so only Phoebe was awake for the jollity. I got all nostalgic with a pint of Guinness in my hand - it's been a long time... This is Dave at an angle. It's not the photo - he was actually standing like that...

It was still raining on and off through Sunday evening and about 11pm we had the biggest thunderstorm I have heard in years - the ground shook, the rain hammered on the tent, the lighning flashed all around... and every single one of our children slept through the whole thing. Eh? How come they wake up if you whisper and tiptoe near them, but can sleep through Armageddon? Anyway, the tent survived perfectly apart from being a tad damp so we had to put it up again on the deck when we got home to dry it out. All good practice!

All in all had a really awesome, relaxing, enjoyable, funny, entertaining weekend and we can't thank Graham and Leanne enough for including us - if we hang around we'll definitely be serial attendees. Needless to say, the kids adored camping and we have already planned the next camping trip in March - just 20 minutes down the road to Barwon Heads this time for the Labour Day weekend. But we may go somewhere sooner than that if the mood takes us... Watch this space!

Broom Broom

2008-10-29T18:16:00.000+11:00

So back in October, we went off to the Supercross bike championship's Geelong meet - for which they had taken over Skilled Stadium, the home of the Geelong Cats. Didn't really know what to expect from this, but it turned out to be a really enjoyable day. First of all, the weather was cracking and since we were there for four hours, luckily we were in a covered stand.

Learned that being in a 'dry' stand doesn't include beer... after all, it's just like pop, right? Nick said he felt under-tattooed for the occasion. Come to think of it, so did I.

We watched some racing, then some freestyle stunts, then more racing. Loved the height they go over the jumps and the kids loved the crashes - but then they just all jump back on their bikes and keep going...

And we've become fans (at least temporarily) of Chad Reed - he won every race he was in and is currently leading the championship...

Only 21°C today? Best pop on a cardi...

2008-10-19T15:00:00.000+11:00

Yes, I confess, the place is getting to me. Thursday here was a chilly 21° and I did wonder whilst dressing whether I should pop on a cardi in addition to the vest top and t-shirt I was already wearing. And I was distinctly miffed that the weekend forecast was only for 20°, thus forcing me to rethink my plans of doing something nice with the children. Eh? Someone slap me.... quick. That would be a Dunbar heatwave, for goodness sake. Flesh would be bared at Lauderdale, children would be launched down the beach at Gullane and ice cream would be consumed in North Berwick. I fear that if we stay here, 21° will be overcoat weather!!

Anyway, I have got so behind with the blog that I thought I would take this opportunity to give you an update on me and Nick, accompanied by photos of our children as that's much easier in the eye that photos of us!!

Well, my news in no particular order:

(1) I am now 38. This is not a good thing. But it is better than the alternative. And, for the first time in my life it was sunny and warm on my birthday. Quite liked that bit...

(2) I have been responsible for the global financial crisis. I moaned about the Aussie dollar. I wished it was worth less as everything seemed so expensive. And now my wishes have come true. The Aussie Dollar is now basically worth two peanuts and a fag-end, and of course now that Nick is earning dollars, I am, as they say, hoist on my own petard... Nevertheless, those of us with no savings and a huge mortgage are reaping the benefits, but not so good if you were nearing retirement and have now had to put it off (again) till your mid-nineties. Erm, sorry about that Dad...

(3) I have discovered that my alter ego is apparently Mrs Tibbles. It must be, because people keep phoning here and asking for her. Surely no-one is really called Mrs Tibbles? That's a cat, right? I am still working up the courage to miaow at the next person who calls...

(4) I still have tennis elbow. This is most likely not clearing up because I am old. See (1). According to Nick, it will probably not get better till I rest it. Hmmm. In about 2015 then.

(5) I have joined a gym. This is because I am still wearing four children and would like to return to a less rotund state, but have struggled to get myself moving. This is because I am old. See (1). I will, of course, only be able to do exercise not involving my right elbow. See (4)... The gym has a creche. This means that I will have no excuse not to go. Except for the elbow - see (4)... and being old - see (1) again...

(6) I have managed to fill my diary to bursting point and am now moaning about how many things I have to fit in, rather than the fact that my diary is empty. This leads me to believe that I am just an old (see 1) moanbag. But it's good to be busy and life here has taken on a turn for the normal - I feel like I could quite happily stay here, or at least give it longer than a year, but equally I'd be just as happy if we decided to go home. Life from January will be very different with Will at school and Ella at kinder two half days a week. Should be able to make the most of that gym membership!!

(7) Ah yes - forgot to mention that the kinder gods have been smiling and Ella has been offered a place at St Lukes Kinder, which is where Will goes just now. It was totally unexpected as we had basically been told that we were too far down the list to be likely to get one, but we jumped at the chance when offered. The fact that it's in Highton makes it a bit further to drive (less than 10 minutes) but if we do stay here, I'm fairly confident that Highton is where we'll go, as it's got bigger houses and plots for less money than here in town, but also has a village atmosphere with all the shops and services you could need. And we know lots of people who live there already. OK, lots is an exaggeration, but a few!!

(8) Australia is full, apparently. I know this because a ute parked around the corner has a bumper sticker which says so. Actually, it says F*** off, we're full, which is nice. And patently untrue. This place is bloody empty!! Even the busy bits are, well, not that busy. Anywhere that still mostly builds one storey homes is not full. OK, there are plenty bits of Australia you might find it challenging to live in, but then the bumper sticker doesn't say 'F*** off, the easy bits are full'. Actually, maybe I'm attributing punctuation beyond his capabilities to this muppet, and maybe it's 'F*** off were full' (so I had to come and live in Geelong). Either way, Nick reckons it's more racist than South Africa here. I'm not so sure about that ( I think in SA they've just stopped saying it out loud) but I will agree that the lack of political correctness here makes me wince. And generally I hate all things PC, but some comments here have had my jaw hitting the floor...

(9) I can no longer bake ANYTHING. Everything I have tried to bake here has pretty much been a disaster. Sunken cakes, burnt flapjacks, floury fairy cakes..... I think this is either (a) the fact that there is no baking marg here and they bake all their sponges with butter or (b) cake karma, as I can clearly remember Nick's mum telling me about 15 years ago how when she moved from SA to the UK that none of her baking worked out, and I can remember thinking 'and this has WHAT to do with me, exactly????' (Sorry J!) So now it's payback time. And even Mary Berry's cake book has failed me. And sponge cake made with butter is horrible and greasy and even James won't eat it... So I announced that I was going to buy all my cakes from now on and Nick was so outraged that he bought me a KitchenAid mixer for my birthday - pink, of course... A dream to use, but Ella's birthday cake still sank and was greasy.... Methinks I need an Australian recipe book and to investigate margarines here to see if any will do the trick.

(10) and finally - we have escaped the clutches of the Australian police. We got a speeding fine the DAY we arrived in Australia for doing 114kmph in a 100kmph zone and it eventually caught up with us, having been sent to Dunbar, redirected to my dad and sent back to Geelong. Well, I was all set to cough the $220 till I spoke to a friend at playgroup who said 'No mate, you don't wanna do that, you wanna appeal. It'll be roight' Or something like that. So I appealed on the grounds that we had just arrived on an overnight flight, were in an unfamiliar car, on unfamiliar roads, with unfamiliar speed limits and were trying to navigate our way into Geelong at the point we were zapped. And I though about adding the fact that their speed limits are ridiculously low (100kmph is the top) but felt this might not help.... So anyway, two weeks later, we get a lovely reply telling us that our infringement has been withdrawn in favour of an Official Warning, and a reminder that road laws are for the safety of all road users. Which I agree with, except for the fact that, as far as I can see, the speed limit is the only road law in Australia. The rest of the time it's pretty much a free-for-all where half the cars are neon utes driven by testosterone-fuelled 20-somethings, and the other half are 1970's saloons driven by old folks on a day pass and held together by prayer and denture paste.

And now for Nick's news:

(1) He has been to two conferences. One in Sydney, one in Hobart in Tasmania. Now, I'm sure bits of them were interesting, and bits were boring, but I'm also sure that at no point did he have to accompany anyone to the toilet, wipe someone else's drool off his clothes or rock someone till they fell asleep, so sounds like a good deal in my book. He really enjoyed catching up with some old friends in Sydney, and said that Tassie was gorgeous, so I think we will try to get over there as a family sometime soon - we can go by boat and take the car, or fly, so will see what the cheapest option is...

(2) He has (wait for it) Medicare number for all three hospitals, provider numbers for all three hospitals and a spot on the on-call rota for the odd shift here and there. So this means that he can bill for private assisting and also get paid for on call. Result! He would still like to be doing more on a day-to-day basis, but things have settled down into somewhat of a routine and we are loving having him home for tea every night and around for the odd afternoon too. He changes rotation after Christmas and is hoping that he will be able to do more operating from then on.

(3) He has been cycling to work every day - takes less that 10 minutes door to door, though I think it's a lot easier on the way home as that is mostly downhill!

(4) He has gone Aussie and purchased a black leather 'swagman's hat' to keep the sun of his shiny bit (yes, yes, I know, he's not bald, it's a solar panel for a sex machine...) Sounds dodgy, looks rather dashing. But obviously I will keep taking the mick.

(5) He is the world's best husband for taking the kids out to let me get the blog done!!

And finally, some quickies:

Phoebe is crawling
Ella is toilet trained
James and Will have started cricket We have booked most of our January roadtrip - details soon...

James' Birthday Party

2008-10-19T14:10:00.002+11:00

Just a few pics from our big boy's 7th birthday party. Held a couple of weeks late due to school holidays and parental disorganisation, but a roaring success nonetheless.

The party was at a local indoor rock-climbing facility and all the boys in James' class were in attendance, as well as Thomas and Matthew (Graham and Leanne's two youngest). The boys were all roped and harnessed with an adult on the bottom of every rope, so they basically climed up and abseiled down.

I supplied the food, the boys supplied the mess and someone else cleaned it up. Bliss...

They all had a great time climbing and all made it to the top of the wall and cake turned out OK too considering that it was iced AT the party - long story... Fortunately these pics were taken before Ella swiped her finger through the 'James'...

The advantage of having a party two weeks late is of course the unexpected additional presents. There was a definite Bakugan theme to this years gifts so James was overjoyed as he has gone from 3 to 20-odd in the blink of an eye.

James declared that it was the best party he had ever had. No pressure for next year then...

Guns, Geese, Geelong Show

2008-10-19T14:10:00.001+11:00

Okay, lots of blogging to catch up on here so I'll start at the beginning...

Fresh on the heels of the Melbourne Show came the Geelong Show. Smaller, yes, classier....no!! Though the food hall was still good and we did indulge in chocolate strawberries on a stick again.

Showbags were still a big part of the day, but this time I thought we'd go with non-character efforts since we really didn't need any more Cars/Dora/Wall-e/Ben 10/Simpsons/Iron Man/Disney Princess anything in the house. So after much to-ing and fro-ing up and down the aisles, the boys declared that they would like the pirate bag and cowboy bag and Ella went with pink fairy. Usually I don't let the boys have weapons, partly because I'm trying to do the whole responsible-parent-weapons-are-bad kind of thing, but mostly because they beat the bejesus out of each other within minutes and there are always tears and tantrums. So anyway, for reasons of sun/wine tasting/mummy magnanimity, I gave in and we piled the pram high with swag including one rifle, two pistols, a blunderbuss, a bow and arrow, a pirate cutlass, a dagger and a fairy wand you could have someone's eye out with. And in the animal petting tent we met James' teacher. And I had to decide whether to (a) pretend the pram didn't contain an arsenal big enough to mount a country-wide coup or (b)try to pull the sun shade over the whole lot whilst conducting an uninterrupted hello-nice-to-see-you-yes-isn't-that-a-lovely-fluffy-lamb kind of conversation. Either way, I just know she was walking away thinking 'it always starts with the parents...'

The Dodgems were a big hit too - James and Will loved driving their own car and after James worked out that he could just keep the wheel on full lock and hit everyone else by doing small circles in the middle, he was happy. It was supposed to be a two minute ride, but time is flexible here and I think they were on about 15 minutes.

Apart from that, we saw snakes and baby crocs - the snake man told the kids never to touch a snake but always to back away slowly and get a grown up, who will presumably know what to do. Or, in my case, scream hysterically and run away as fast as my ageing bones will allow. And if the children can keep up, they can come too... Apparently, more people are killed in Australia by horses than snakes each year. Knew there was a reason I didn't like horses!

We went for a wander around the craft tent, and in the middle of an enlightening discussion on spinning with one of the local ladies, I turned around to find all of my children on stage... in some kind of dodgy pirate show with a scientific purpose. Ella did a great stage whisper of 'Mum, these pirates are really bad' and got more of a laugh than she was expecting!

We also went in a huge shed full of old steam engines and generators ranging from full size train and tractor engines down to tiny steam miniatures - all working, Nick was fascinated! Children not so much...

And yes, the pig diving was back at the Geelong show - but that is old hat now... This time we were fortunate enough to witness the goose fashion show. I'm still wondering what kind of person gets up in the morning and thinks 'today I'm going to dress my goose'. And having had that bizarre urge, presumably then moves on to 'today I'm going to custom-sew clothes for my goose. In several colours. And then I'm going to build a cat(goose)walk. And see if my geese want to walk up and down it for the amusement of the general public'. Sheesh....

And finally, here are my beautiful children in full show regalia. Yes, I know Will looks like Jimmy Somerville in his Bronski Beat days. Nuff said...

Does a Triceratops have teeth? And where are all the ducks?

2008-10-12T21:27:00.000+11:00

At the risk of actually being up to date with this blog, I will herewith give you all an update on each junior member of the family, in ascending order of age...

Phoebe (or Chubber as Will is now calling her) alternates between absolutely lovely and absolutely heinous. Basically, as long as she is stuffing food into her mouth or being held by a parent (or, ideally, both at the same time) then she is happy. Otherwise she is generally screaming in a meet-my-needs-now-dammit kind of way. She can scream through car journeys, supermarket trips, getting dressed, getting undressed, being spoon-fed (more about that in a mo), being put in the pram.... It's become the soundtrack to my life, and in fact she is doing it now so I think I'll just go and pour myself a glass of wine!!

Her repertoire of sounds has expanded past dadadadada and now includes 'the coffee machine' 'cccccccchhhhhhh ccchhhh chhch chhh chch'. And of course, 17 different ways to scream!

Food is a big part of Phoebe's life, but now that she has discovered that she can feed herself from her highchair tray, she completely refuses to be spoon fed (though will make an exception for yoghurt) and is rejecting all 'mush' food. In the last few days she has powered her way through pepper and ham omelette, chicken sandwiches, tuna and brocolli pasta, pork and peanut noodles, avocado, watermelon, strawberries, raisins, breadsticks, ricecakes, toast and marmalade, grated cheese, banana, fishfingers, peas.... Probably more but that's all I can remember recently! In spite of this, she is actually rather a petite soul - well, as far as this family goes anyway - being just under the 50th centile for height and weight.

Part of the eating frenzy has also probably been triggered by the fact that she now has four top teeth to go with her two bottom ones. Putting a finger in her mouth is NOT a good idea. Actually, putting anything with pain receptors in her mouth is not a good idea - she decided to try out her new pearly whites on me a couple of weeks ago when I was feeding her and I yelled so loudly she didn't feed again for three days!

She is mobile in so far as she can roll to get anywhere she wants to, but she is also now pushing herself backwards and also pushing herself up into a bridge shape on her hands and feet. I keep telling her there really is no rush, but she's not listening (that's how I know she's a Shortt)

Ella continues to be a cheeky wee minx with attitude, but is still our greatest source of amusement on a daily basis. She has taken to pluralising everything ending in a consonant with '-ses', like brainses, kneeses, pramses, spoonses...., describes something vaguely pink as 'pinklish' and is apparently attending 'playgroupery' on a Tuesday...

We have a huge world map on the wall and I thought (at first) that geography with a two year old was going exceptionally well. Foolish woman.
'Mummy, what's that country?'
'The Russian Federation'
'Rush-in Federay-shun. What's that one?'
'Libya'
'Libby-ya'
'And do you know where this is that we are living in now?'
'Australia!!'
'Well done Ella!'
'And what is the blue country?'
'That's the sea and it goes all around the world.'
'Oh. And where are all the ducks?'
'Ermmmmm...'

But she's not daft. The other day's conversation ran as follows after I told her off:

'Ella Shortt! Don't you dare stick your tongue out at me! Come here for a smack on your bottom'
'Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo'
Well, do you have something to say to me?'
'Don't smack me!'

And finally, finally, toilet training seems to be going well. Smartie bribery is working (one for a number one, two for a number two) as is having her own mini-seat for the toilet. Not in the conventional sense, you understand.... She refused to sit on the big toilet without being held, I bought her her own special seat so that she didn't need to worry, now she goes every time without the special seat to prove what a big girl she is. Worth every penny of the $9.95 I spent on it. But really, oppositional or what?

Will has a mutual appreciation society going with Phoebe at the moment - he loves her, she loves him, they grin at each other...

He has had his first orientation session at Manifold Heights and is so looking forward to starting school. He has another four sessions culminating in a big parents and pupils picnic so he should meet lots of the children he will be at school with - important, as he isn't at kinder with any of them. I do think though that the fact that he will be at school with his big brother will help too.

Apart from that, he has been a bit of a wee horror recently - I suspect just doing a bit of boundary pushing, but it comes as a bit of a shock when it's Will in trouble most of the time! Apparently he is an angel at kinder though... and I got to see a day at kinder last week when I was on 'parent duty' - Will loved showing me all the toys and all his friends and showing off his sisters. Ella of course thought she actually was at kinder- she loved sitting down for storytime and snack and helping with the weather report.

Will has also started asking the kind of questions I used to expect of James - most recently 'Did Triceratops have teeth?' and 'If there were no people, who looked after the dinosaurs in the safari park?' and 'Why does there have to be sand on beaches, cos I don't really like the sand. Could there not just be grass?' Good question Will, I don't much like the sand either!

If you think Will and co look a bit odd in this pic, it's because they coloured their faces in with chalk to be Red Indians. Actually, Ella coloured all of herself in.... We also made headdresses with 'feathers' and they whooped around the garden for hours.

James has been - wait for it - an absolute gem in the last few weeks. So helpful and well behaved. He says it's because he's 7 now, bless! He loved his week at Cartoon Camp and I have scanned some of the drawings he did here. Not only did he really improve his drawing skills, but he has picked up a lot about the different styles and now points out Manga, Disney and so on when we are out and about.

He got a new Quiksilver scooter for his birthday (the boys have really been missing their scooters from home) and has been putting it to good use on the ramps at Sparrow Park. We also got him some books, DS games, Star Wars figures and DVD's and he got lots of generous gifts from the UK too.

We also finally got the results from his assessment - interesting but inconclusive. It said he was of above/high above average intelligence, but not off the scale (which we knew) and that he should not need any special provision in a normal school. It also said that he might be bored at school here as he has come from 'one of the strongest education systems in the world' (so there!!) but that he is also what is termed 'hypercompetitive' which basically means that although he is obsessed with winning and coming first, he doesn't want to learn the skills required to do that. This means that often he doesn't try if his success is not assured, or will not attempt something if he considers it 'too difficult'. Which we also knew!!! It has reminded us of how long it took James to learn to ride his bike because he refused to try in case he fell off, and how he refused to try to catch a ball in case he didn't manage... Both of which he can now manage with considerable skill, so presumably there is light at the end of the tunnel!

We suspect that either boredom or his lack of persistence may be at the root of his intermittent disruptive behaviour in the classroom, so we are going to see another educational specialist in a couple of weeks to see what we/he can do to sort it out. We are well aware that in the grand scheme of things, James is absolutely not a 'problem', but I think it's worth seeing if a bit of a tweak now could make his journey through school a bit smoother- for all concerned!

Dinos, dingoes, drookit weans

2008-10-05T12:14:00.001+11:00

We have had school holidays here in the first week of October, and as this co-incided with Nick spending three days in Sydney, I thought I'd better get out and about with the kids in order to stave off insanity...

First we went off to the Hatching The Past exhibition at the Wool Museum in Geelong where we learned all about dinosaur eggs and babies. It isn't a big exhibition, but was pretty hands-on with the kids excavating eggs and bones and messing about in dino suits.... Raaaarrrrr!!! Didn't actually kill enough time with the dinos, so went round the Wool Museum too. Geelong apparently has a big wool/weaving history and the Wool Museum was surprisingly interesting, or at least it would have been if not for the screaming (mine) and running (kids)...

So in order to calm them down (ha ha), and as a birthday treat for James, we went for large quantities of chocolate at The Chocolate Room We have one just near the end of our street - 20 flavours of Italian hot chocolate , chocolate fondues, chocolate melting pots, chocolate cakes - the kids always have a chocolate fondue with strawberries, bananas and marshmallows for dipping and in spite of its generous proportions, it lasts about 20 seconds.

The next day (scorching) we packed a big picnic and headed off to Jirrahlinga Wildlife Sanctuary about half an hour outside Geelong to see some real Australian animals. Now, I should point out that I did take pictures of dingoes, emu and a wombat called Sebastian, but they weren't being hugely co-operative, so I won't bore you with the dull pictures. But you can see the koalas (the one the kids are petting is called Billy), kangaroos and an echidna which is basically a big hedgehog.... except for having that whole egg-laying-mammal-mutant-freaky-marsupial-only-in-Australia thing going on. I did laugh when I read on Wikipedia that a young echidna is called a puggle and spends 45 - 50 days in its mother's pouch until it starts to develop spines at which point she deposits it in a burrow. No kidding. If only we could all deposit our children in a burrow when they become problematic!

After Jirrahlinga, we made an unscheduled trip to the beach at Barwon Heads for a little paddle which ended in the usual head-to-toe soaking.... Hence the 'drookit weans', which for those of you not fortunate enough to be Scottish, means 'soaked children'. This is a really lovely little safe beach running along the side of the mouth of the Barwon River just as it meets the sea and I'm sure we'll be there many times over the coming months.

The kids had a great time throwing water over each other with their newly-acquired dollar-shop buckets, and then proceeded to trek half the beach back into my car. But then, I am driving a Kia Carnival and I don't really care. It's very liberating driving something which is so trashed that it's hard to see how you could make it worse... though the kids are trying!

Headed back to Geelong West, stopped at the new ice cream shop for yummy cones, did a quick mental calculation of the increase in my hip size likely to be attributable to said shop over the next few months... and vowed to walk to the shop from now on in a kind of calorie-offsetting exercise! Children exhausted from all the fresh air , mother exhausted from all the children... Job done!