Melbourne Grand Prix 2009

We didn't think we could let our year go past without attending the Melbourne Grand Prix. As a one-time serious Formula One fan, I was always desperate to go to one and the experience did not disappoint.

And it was CHEAP to go - unlike the European Grands Prix, it cost about £90 to admit all of us for race day. We were almost sabotaged in our attemps to enter by a Melbourne train driver who dropped us (and about 30 others) at a station which was closed for the day as he had (wait for it) gone straight past the Gate 2 stop he was meant to stop at. Now, most of the stations are out of service on Grand Prix day, so he had a pretty straightforward gig - city centre, Gate 1, Gate 2.... and repeat in reverse.... but still he managed to cock it up, so we had to walk a bit (after actually having to climb out of the closed, gated, locked station...) but once we got there we loved the venue and the buzz.

There was so much going on - all kinds of classic cars on display, food and drink tents, lots of boozing and schmoozing. There was also plenty of flesh on display - Nick said he had to take a picture of this girl as she was wearing a chequered flag. Do I , as they say, look like I came up the Clyde on a banana boat?



We parked ourselves on the corner at turn three and tried to find a big enough space for all of us and Graham, Leanne and the boys - no mean feat as the banking was already heaving and the race was still FIVE hours away!




Fortunately, there was plenty of pre-race entertainment - three other types of car race - each louder than the one before. We had earphones for everyone - Phoebe tolerated hers for about 30 seconds, so I resorted to putting a hairband round her head.

We had army helicopters flying right overhead, followed by an aerial display team who were awesome. on about their third pass, one peeled of the back and did a twisty, corkscrew move. 'That one is just showing off' said James. Nick and I nearly choked on our beer - Umm, James, showing off is kind of de rigueur for a stunt pilot...



There was also the new Qantas Airbus A380 - otherwise known as the 'really big plane' and a military jet which moved so fast I didn't get any pictures - but the noise reminded me of Dunbar...





And at last it was time for the racing - I can't describe how loud a field of Formula One cars is, or how fast they move, but it was great to witness. It was the first race of the season, and the first race for Brawn Racing who subsequently took the first and second spots. I've been a big fan of Ross Brawn since his days at Benetton and Ferarri and I think he was directly responsible for much of their success through being a better strategist than anyone else in Formula one - even when he didn't have the best cars.


The green and white car in these pictures - the one with no sponsorship - is Jensen Button streets ahead of the field...

I have to be honest and say that the view of an F1 race is far better on the TV, but you don't go for the view! It was a gorgeous, hot day, a great atmosphere and the setting in Albert Park is stunning. The kids did remarkably well - considering how confined by the crowds we were, and the usual Shortt tactic of 'just keep feeding them' worked as well as ever. And they seemed not remotely bothered by the noise - in fact, Phoebe slept through about an hour of it.

Gran Anne visits

Yes, yes, I know I'm writing this in a kitchen in East Lothian, and my blogging tardiness has reached epic proportions, but just suspend your disbelief for a while and pretend we're still in Geelong!!

So, in April my mum (finally) came to visit.

I think she was hoping that if she waited long enough, maybe we would have left and she could do a nice Australian tour without the added complication of family visits in the middle, but we're not so easy to get rid of!! (Just kidding ma!)

Anyway, I was very proud of her as, prior to meeting up with us in Torquay, she had ventured solo from the UK to Singapore, spent a few days there, flew to Perth, spent a few days there, flew to Adelaide and then driven all the way along the Great Ocean Road. Way to go Gran Anne!! And after seeing us, she moved on to Melbourne and Sydney, and then back to the UK with a LOT of luggage.

So, in spite of my advice that Winter was upon us, and the weather could be pretty chilly, the first couple of days were scorching - this is us at lunch and then messing about in the huge playpark in Torquay.

We went off the next day to get the ferry from Queenscliff to Sorrento - which as you will note from the website, crosses Port Philip Bay 24 times a day, on the hour,every hour... Remember that bit - it's important.

Ella is holding a sick bag in the picture due to her intermittent tendency to pebble-dash the inside of cars with her stomach contents. She has also been known to turn it into a multi-sensory production by following such and event with a chirpy chorus of 'What's that coming over the hill - is it vomit? Is it vomit?'

We had a lovely walk around Sorrento (lovely town, lovely shops, lovely lunch) and then headed off around to Frankston (which is on the opposite side of Port Phillip Bay to Geelong - see map) to go and see the Sand Sculpting Dinosaurs exhibition.

I have never seen anything like it - the scale, complexity and the attention to detail. The weather wasn't so great - wet and windy - and I think at one point we were the only people in there - but the kids had a riot doing sand pictures, ably assisted by Gran Anne.

Once we had drunk our foam-free cappucinos (the foam blew away - seriously) and picked all the bits of coloured sand out of various orifices, we headed back to the car to drive around and get the ferry. In no particular rush, I might add, since Nick had done the checking, and assured us the ferry ran 24 hours a day. Now, the more observant (female) among you may have noticed that the website does in fact say 24 crossings, not 24 hours, but we'll get to that bit in a minute...

So we left Frankston about 5.15, thinking we might get the 6pm ferry, but more than likely the 7pm - probably with a healthy dinner courtesy of the Golden Arches in between. And although I drove the Kia of Khaos like a demon, even managing a little wheel-screech on the roundabouts, we pulled into the ferry terminal just as the ferry was pulling out. Steve McQueen would have gone for it, but sanity prevailed and, after all, there'd be another one along in a hour. Chugging optimistically into the dark, deserted, unlit, empty, desolate, abandoned ferry terminal. Umm, Nick - could you go and check that timetable over there?

And that's when The Scottish Factor reared its ugly head again - mysteriously absent for months, and now resurrected by the arrival of my mother. There was, in fact, no 7 o'clock ferry. The next one was 6am the following morning. AND to add insult to injury, until two days previously, there had been a 7 o'clock ferry, but we were now on the Winter time table as the clocks had just gone back...

So, after a few moments of banging head on steering wheel, we turned around, headed BACK along the road to Frankston for only the third time that day, and then drove the loooooooooong way home around the bay. Ho-hum.

Under direction of mother, went off to Anglesea Golf Course to do some kangaroo spotting (don't be fooled by suggestions that Australia is overrun with kangaroos living in the wild and bouncing freely, Skippy-like through the bush - they do in fact all live an easy life on green, lush, watered golf courses where they get food, free veterinary attention and all the rounds of golf they can manage). If your eyesight's good, you might actually be able to spot one in this picture!!

In a fit of lunacy, decided to spend the next day in Melbourne showing Gran Anne the sights - or, in our case, the inside of a lot of shops! Mother managed to buy stuff in Laura Ashley (that well known Australian shop) whilst Lovely Hubby took all four children to the museum. Anyway, the rest of the day was uneventful, until we got on the 7 o'clock train home... and the Scottish Factor kicked in again. 6.55pm, cue conductor's announcement - 'Ladies and Gentlemen, we are sorry to advise that, due to a fatality on the line at Laverton, this train has now been cancelled and we will be arranging buses to take you to your destination' Aaaaarrrrrrgh!!! Won't bore you with the details of the painful trip home, but suffice to say we got home at 10.30 and told my mum we were never having another family trip involving her ever.

And finally, this is what she was responsible for when I went to the gym one night... Note the boys are wearing my shoes, as well as all their sister's jewellery. This woman is not to be trusted in charge of children...